A man walks into a drug store and wanders up and down the aisles. Finally the clerk asks if she can help him find anything. "Yeah," he says. "My wife sent me in here to get tampons." The clerk tells him they're in aisle four. A minute later he walks up to the counter with a bale of string and a bag of cotton balls. "What's this?" the clerk asks. "I thought you were looking for tampons." "Well, you see," replies the man. "It's like this. The other day my wife was going to the store and I asked her if she could pick me up a carton of cigarettes. She came back with a tin of tobacco and rolling papers and said 'You know, it'd be so much cheaper if you rolled them yourself.'"
Guy walks in to a bar and see's another man with a very small piano player He asks how he got it A magic lamp he tells him The 1st man then ask's if he can have one of the wishes and the other agrees "I wish for a million bucks!" Just then a million ducks enter the bar "I didn't wish for a million ducks" he complains The second man says "I didnt wish for a 12 inch pianist either"