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Need everyone's opinion Please!! At one point is it okay to decide if you must choose your family/partner over the other?

This is actually just a curious question. After hearing from different coworkers on how some had big problems with their immediate family because of who they were dating and some who didn't have any. I believe you should value your family's opinion on the person you date but my question is how far? and how many people believe they should just tell their family to "back off" and let them date who they want. At what point. ?? I work with an older lady who has been with her husband for 20 some years and doesn't get along with her immediate family because of it but she said her husband and children are now her family. How do you solve issues with partners family without giving them up?

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This is the sort of thing everyone needs to evaluate in their particular circumstances. Someone whose family is manipulative or abusive shouldn't take to heart too much what their family thinks about a choice of partner. Someone whose family is loving and supportive might well pay heed to a cautionary word of advice.
Once a person makes a choice as to marriage partner, the family needs to respect and support that choice. If they don't, then the marriage takes precedent over family (as your older coworkers says - her husband and children are her family now).

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Makes a lot of sense. Guess it's just hard for many people to get over some things.
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When a tooth is said to be prepared in the Chamfer design, this means that one of its edged has been beveled. This term is also used in other fields such as woodwork, architecture and printed circuit board (PCB) design.

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Bros before hoes , always

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so are you going to get married to your brothers and have children with them? lol
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Fortunately my Mom raised us to do what makes us happy as long as we are not hurting anyone else.
As far as others' opinions of your romantic life are concerned you must know opinions are like aholes everyone has one but will you use theirs or yours when you gotta go...
You should listen to the advice, take into account from whom it's coming, their intentions, their track record in their own lives, how truly informed they are of your situation, whether or not the advice given to you was solicited or unsolicited. Weigh all that and then decide what is best for you. If the advice givers don't approve of your decision and are mature they will back off themselves; but will be there for you if you need them. On the other hand if they are immature and don't backoff it is no longer advice but meddling and you should backoff from them, but be there if they need you.
In the south we say, "You like it, I love it, but I wants no part of it".

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My mother-in-law told my husband, before she ever met me, because I am of Scottish heritage I am stubborn. Also since I was raised catholic but not confirmed this bothered her. There was third thing but I can't remember right now what it was. She had basically wrote me off before meeting me. I have never had a problem with anyone's relatives that I had dated and this bothered me at first. I was determined to make a good impression. I even asked her how she wanted me to address her. Did she want me to call her by her first name, or could I call her "Mom" . She came back with "Mrs Smith". I was totally stunned, She constantly compared me to my husband's old girl friends and told me how wonderful they were and how they still called her. She even gave one of them our home number. This "wonderful person" , when dating my husband had slipped acid in his drink with him knowing. And was also married to someone while dating my husband. And that is who she chose to give my home number too? Get real. We had a little chat and we changed our number.


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I have basically figured out she is a self centered, woe-is-me type person, She will never be happy. I have long ago given up on trying. My husband and I have been married 15 years, which is probably longer than her 4 marriages combined. We also moved 1/2 way across the country to get away from her. We have decided we will never live closer that a 4 hr drive from her. That is close enough that if you need to be there in an emergency you can be, but far enough that you don't have to run over all the time. Right now we are a 12 hr drive away.
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I see. I'm just glad to know I'm not the only one with problems lol
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Oh my, she sounds like a real winner! For the "awful mother-in-law contest," that is.
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Jeez, Gatorblu, what a dreadful person!! I'm lucky, I have a slightly loopy, lovable M in L. But I'll choose my husband over all my in-laws if it came to that.
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