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My ex and I have 50/50 custody of 15 year old daughter. She refuses to visit mom. Can mom force her to visit, or is it child's choice at 15?

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Whether there is joint custody or not, a child at the age of 15 can choose to not go to their mothers house if they do not wish to. 15 years of age is well over the limit for the child to choose for themselves.

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After age 14, judge will listen to the child

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She shouldn't have to if she doesn't want to. If she really wanted to I'll bet she could talk to the judge and get the moms rights revoked

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After 14 she can chose

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As a father you should talk to your daughter about her reasons for not wanting to visit her mother. If she has a logical basis for her reason you support her & try to rectify the problem so she can have a relationship with her mother. All girls need that relationship, if you don't insist on that with her she will blame you as an adult for it. Now if her reason is not to go to her moms is because she doesn't like the rules & she doesn't get her way then tough for her & a pat on the shoulder for mom, sometimes children put their parents in situation to make each other the bad one. Legally if your daughter has no basis for not going there, the mom can bring this matter in court and hold you responsible for going through with the order which will make all parties argue. It's okay to support your daughter & her mother at the same time, just be the bigger person in the end it will pay off for the whole family. Good luck.

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Jes

Thank you for your response

First, I haven't done anything to prevent them from being together.

There isn't a justifiable reason. Her reason is "she doesn't like her". She is very angry at mom for leaving and I think she is "punishing" her mom. She has lost respect for her. I've encouraged her to go spend time with her, or at least call her or have lunch with her, but she refuses. It's really tough and she/we are seeing a counselor. I really want them to bond again, but I don't know how forceful I should be. (ie take away her cell if she doesn't go)
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I commend you on being a good Dad that your daughter will look back on as a women and know that you supported in saving her relationship with her mom. It's natural for her to be angry with her, just keep letting her know that her mom still loves her, she did not leave her just the relationship. As long as you stay consistent she will see the light.
As for taking away cell phone, not a good idea, you don't want her to see it as punishment if she doesn't see her mom. Then she won't try to understand her moms action and she will be reluctant to fix the problem. You should still bring her to her moms for the visit, instead of a whole weekend try just one day to show her that you're trying to work with her as well or start by just a visit at a coffee shop or mall for a few hours which you stay in the area to take her home. You try to show her that you're on both sides and you're trying to be there for her. Good communication between you and your ex is important as well and it will help diffuse the situation and let her know what you're planning and you two work together to make your daughter happy. Baby steps, it will all be worth it in the end. Girls grow up to be women who come to understand why our parents are the way they were when we was growing up. Good luck with everything.
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