Submit a question to our community and get an answer from real people.
Submit
garymozomann

How to improve love in friendship?

Hi. I admit that I am bisexual. I have a guy friend in my hometown, with whom I've spent my whole boyhood. Recently after 12 years, I happen to meet him - Both of us are grown ups and It was great that he recognized me. We then had some chat, we had many good times before I could leave him again. This year I am going to meet him again, It seems as if I have a crush on him. But I don't want to ruin my friendship by seducing him. I just want him to know that I love him as always and I want to improve a true love in our friendship.

What can be done, such that our love will grow up to a state where we love to see each other often, would like to hug each other for longer time, talk through phone for a long time and exactly like lovers do?

Report as
BetterWithAge

Gary,
12 years have elapsed since you have seen each other. You want to make sure that your feelings are reciprocated. The worst thing that you could do is jump in the sack right off the bat. You don't want to rush into things to begin with. Just play it by ear to begin with. I would just take it slowly at first. Be a good friend, be warm and compassionate. There's not too much you can do as far as making a move until you find out where your friend is at.
If he is reciprocating his feelings, then you can be more open about yours.

Helpful (3) Fun Thanks for voting Comments (5)
Report as
garymozomann
BWA, Thanks for your answer. I don't think my feelings are not reciprocated as well as his feelings. In those 12 years gap, I always used to think of the good times we had as small boys. Last time when we met, he told me the same that he had always wanted to meet me. Even my relatives who lives in my hometown had told me that my friend used to inquire about me sometimes. It made me happy that he still remembered me.

I agree with your opinion that I should take it slowly, but how? If truth to be told, I am not good in maintaining friendship. How am i supposed to start out our relationship first? (I mean what are the small things i can do to bring compassion, warmness in our friendship)

Thanks again, BWA.
Report as
garymozomann
Sorry. I actually meant this. : "I don't think my feelings are reciprocated as well as his feelings"
Report as
BetterWithAge
Gary... When you meet up again, remember that 12 years have passed. He may have been asking about you during this time, but you are still different people from when you were children. Try to reconnect as friends first. Maybe you can plan some alone time together, for instance, go out to a movie together, go to dinner, have cocktails out, play some pool, etc.
I wouldn't advise going out to clubs where there are a lot of people because that would defeat your purpose. These are just some ideas, but I think once you both start communicating you'll have a lot better idea of where you're at and how it's going. I'm a romantic at heart, so I'm rooting for you.
Report as
garymozomann
You are really a romantic person, I can see that. ;) Well, you may be right. I like your Ideas. I think I have finally got a best answer from you that is we should start communicating first to have a better idea of where we are at and how it is going. This is what I've been looking for, BWA. Thank you very much.
Report as
BetterWithAge
Fingers crossed, of course. :)
Report as
Add a comment...

Trust, respect and compassion will make love and friendship last forever.

Helpful (1) Fun Thanks for voting Comments (0)
Report as
Add a comment...

You can improve your love in your friendship by expressing your comfort before you meet with her. If you have her number, keep calling her with a lot of concern about her health or welfare. When she is in a sad mood or not feeling well, make this your time to play your role in the relationship. Read more on the site http://www.xhow2.com/You_and_your_friends/How_to_improve_a_friendship.html.

Helpful (1) Fun Thanks for voting Comments (1)
Report as
garymozomann
I think you didn't read my details completely. :)
Report as
Add a comment...
Do you have an answer?
Answer this question...
Did you mean?
Login or Join the Community to answer
Popular Searches