Sounds like 'Daddy-disfunction' to me. She never got the approval that every daughter needs from her dad and will never be 'right in the head' until she does. There's a bevy of fake blondes with the same issue workin' a stripper-pole near you right now.
She is insecure. It's sad that she is fishing for compliments from you. One day out of nowhere, her not asking, tell her how amazing she is, beautiful and that there are others out there but none like her. Take her by surprise, this will go miles with her. Just make sure you aren't caught looking, we all know all guys do. If she compliments another girl Just have a comment back, " she's not you, that's all I need" It also depends on her age an how she has been treated in the past. If she was made fun of because of a body part, or really hurt by someone else this can play a factor too. Just make sure you don't stop complimenting her cause she will revert back to the insecurities.
I can tell you from personal experience, I was dating someone I thought could do better then me. I don't have a confidence problem I just thought he was the best looking man ever. I can only tell you after a few months I excepted he had real feelings for me & I was being stupid.
2 years ago
Last edited at 6:10AM on 7/29/2011
She is probably a bit insecure..been there, done that ...... I am blessed with the best of husbands..He understands me and I love and appreciate him for all he is.We communicate and express...especially me,lol, but that is what a good relationship is all about. There is no perfect couple in the start, relationships have to grow..The good parts, and the not so good parts of the relationship, are what make the relationship/marriage strong. If you love her enough to marry her, assure her in her weaknesses and tell her she is beautiful to you,,both outer and especially her inner beauty. They say one loves, and gives more. You are the giver:)........and that combination works..Just respect one another, be patient and never be afraid to pray.. Best wishes..
She is, like most have replied already, feeling a bit like she falls short. :) Just tell her how pretty she is and mention specifics, like "I love your eyes" or " you are so whitty and smart" etc. If she asks if she looks fat say "NO" LOL ;) My hubby says "no habla espanol"! But really... She just needs your reassurance. We all do ;)
I've always said when it comes to male/female relationships, that life comes in stages! As "youngings" it the girls all starry eyed over the boys! In highschool it can go both ways, in college it's the guys chasing the girls and by that time the women have seen some independence! Post college you're more on equal playing ground and might be lucky enough to find a meaningful and mature relationship... Then the hardest part, you each have all this emotional baggage that can be difficult to get through to finally just concentrating on making your own memories! Also, depending on your age... You can never get past the tried, yet unfortunately true sometimes, that a handsome man can get enamored by a "younger woman" and a lot of times the younger woman plays into it! Just telling you... It's hard being a middle aged confident woman sometimes! Treat her with love, respect, honesty and most of all sincerity!!!
Now, I'm a girl, and personally when I see other girls doing what your girl is doing, it ticks me off. Maybe she does have low self-esteem, and that's okay, but challenging you to prove/explain your feelings for her all the time is NOT the way to boost her confidence. If you love her, you just DO. Love doesn't need reasons; it's illogical and indiscriminate! I mean, why else would abused women still love their partners? Or the partner of a chronic cheater: why does he stay, and stay faithful?
There is nothing wrong with you complimenting your girlfriend, of course. This a good and healthy part of any relationship, but I don't think she should be asking you to lie to her either. When I ask my husband those "risky" questions (do I look fat in this? she's pretty, isn't she?), I don't want a gushy make-me-feel-good response, I want the truth! I would FAR rather have my husband tell me honestly that the pants I've tried on are too tight or don't compliment my shape than to purchase them and walk around in public and have people stare at me and think "Lord, what is she thinking, dressing like that? *barf*". He is my best friend, and i value his opinion and his judgement. I KNOW he's mine, no matter how hot that girl three beach-blankets down is.
Now, I don't suggest that you start being totally blunt with her this afternoon. Because she's clearly not ready for it. But you are not the only one in the relationship that needs to feel appreciated. Tell her that her constant compliment hunting is unfair and unnecessary. The next time she asks you why you love her, turn it around and ask her the same thing! Learning to be honest with each other will go much further in building both your relationship and her self-esteem than any amount of mushy coddling will.
Simple!!! She is hinting for you to tell her you love her and that she's the prettiest female ever! Why? Because you don't say it (enough?)And it's nice to hear. She wants the confirmation, from you, because she loves you. Or... Shes a crazy , messed up, insecure psycho........,like everyone else said .p.s. did you say it alot in the beginning and stop with the complement overload?? you do know you can never ever slack on that, ever, : ) no matter how long you are together. keep it fresh, like in the beginning
She probably feels that you are too good for her and she's wondering why you're dating her when there are so many prettier girls-atleast in her eyes. Either that or she's very insecure and is fishing for compliments.