Why Does My Heart Feel This Way?
Hi! I'm 14 years old and I suffer from depression and anxiety. I also suffer from bad thoughts. They can range from killing to paranormal, and they just pop out of NOWHERE! And I can't stop them. Well, I was in bed one night (about five weeks ago) and I had a bad thought and I got anxiety and started freaking out and telling myself that the thought didn't mean anything. My breathin speed up and I was up all night. Ever since then I've felt physically and emotionally numb. My chest feels hollow and sometimes I can't even feel my heartbeat. It doesn't feel normal, it just feels numb and cold and it doesn't even hurt that much but it just feels wrong! I tell people I love them and I KNOW it's there underneath, but I just can't feel it in my chest. If I'm smiling and laughing and being "happy" I won't feel the joy inside, even though I know it's underneath my pain. Sometimes it's like I need to throw up! Sometimes it's like I can just kill myself and it will all be over and I'll be okay again. I went to the doctor and he gave me anti depression pills but they aren't doing anything for the numb pain. Will this ever go away? How can I get rid of this terrible feeling?