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I would like to know why people think it is okay to judge a girl because she got pregnant as a teenager?

she knows she made a mistake, she knows he did wrong, so could someone please tell me the logic behind treating someone like trash because of that? I don't understand!

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People, especially those that are a little older grew up in a different time and in different ways. Teen pregnancy, interacial relationships, etc, were taboo. That is how they were programmed early on and it's hard to change a mindset that has occurred for a lifetime. You can't fix people sometimes. You can try to understand them and in that way you help yourself. Otherwise, it will get you down because you will never understand it or change it. Younger people these days have learned that teen pregnancy doesnt mean trashy, interacial relationships don't mean- ANYTHING actually. It's just people. It wasn't all that long ago, really around the 80's that people still frowned on unwed Mom's, interacial couples, etc. It was just the way of the times. In the early 90's you were to still be shamed for being homosexual though now in school kids are open about it and are not teased the way they were when I was in school. Times change and the generation of that time will adapt to the change. The generations before that time may never change their minds.

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People think they have the right to judge others all the time. Even those who's own holy book say it is not their place. People judge to feel superior. It's rude and uncalled for!

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Green shelly bean! :)
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tee hee Stacy...ty
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Aww I feel bad seriously that's mean. People are jerks these days. Btw look up susan boyle on youtube that's a good reason not to judge someone.

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It sounds like you're spending too much time with the wrong kind of people. Stop letting them get to you. Just turn them off and make other friends.

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I think she's talking about people here on ASK
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I am.
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ibepwning

Because everyone is responsible for their actions, you only have one life and you're supposed to do good with it, not get knocked up when you're 16.

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For the record, I'm not the one whose knocked up! I'm speaking out for those who get attacked for no reason.
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She is speaking out about a 13 yr old child
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ibepwning
For the record Kendra, I wasn't specifically talking to you, but problems of others. Geez I didn't even know you were 16 it was just a number I picked because the majority of girls who get knocked up are 14-16
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The way that I look at it, those teenagers who get pregnant didn't do anything different from a lot of other teens... they just got caught. I don't judge them unless it was obvious stupidity such as I see on a lot of questions in here... no protection whatsoever, and an "It'll never happen to me" attitude. That is simply irresponsible, reckless, and idiotic.

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Thank you for saying they didn't do anything different from other teenagers, people don't understand that!
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Exactly! And girls asking how to get pregnant. That makes me mad!! No compassion when there was a way to prevent it or they chose to get pregnant. I only feel sorry for the baby
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helixaqua

Sometimes its the anger and the "why" at that moment, its sad and pathetic, but some adults just see it as another person taken money from their paycheck....if anything, its the parents lack of parenting that should be questioned.

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Well said!! Green
It is us who usually pays for it. Just sad
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helixaqua
Thanks :)
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8)
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helixaqua
:) 8)
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Well a lot of times they judge her as easy or the other word. I think it's wrong, but I also girls on here everyday saying their "TTC" (trying to conceive" this is why I wish girls would use a condom and the pill. It's going to be hard on here from here on out. There's no going back sadly. She's going to have to learn:( how old is she? I knew a girl who was only 13. She had to change schools, at my school back then they had to drop out cause that was a big no no at our school. Is she keeping the baby?

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Well, I mean, I personally don't think it's right to do that until marriage. That's what *you know what* was made for. I wouldn't start to pick on a girl because she's pregnant, but I just wonder in my head, "Why did you do that in the first place? I mean, that if the guy you're having the baby with doesn't even care abut you or the baby?" I know some women can handle it on their own, but....I just don't get it

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Because they think teenagers make stupid decisions and think if they treat them badly they would learn a lesson not to do it again but thats not the way to treat people

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I don't think other people's opinions matter! It isn't good to have that on her record, but she is a human being! I respect everyone, and what has gone on in their life. I wouldn't judge her because of that. You judge people by the content of their character!
Hope I helped :)

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It happens due to lack of maturity & experience. Everyone grows up eventually.

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People make mistakes. The general view of teenagers getting pregnant isn't really nice if you think about it.

I agree with you to a certain point. Teenage pregnancy is a big big issue and the girl involved should get as much help and support as she can from the people around her. We all make mistakes and at certain points in time we have been so bad at making them that we tend to forget that other people make them to.

Suggestion is to just don't let it get to you too much. Think of it this way? If you became successful and what not and made and did everything right. Someone's STILL going to not like you. So? Just deal with it and know that you can NEVER PLEASE EVERYONE.

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Everyone judges it's life

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I'd like to be clear that I, personally, do not judge teen mothers. But I may have some insight as to why some people do. It is estimated that 72% of teen moms in America are on welfare (I'll post a link to support that below). The rest of us are paying for their mistake. This is just one of many reasons I advocate proper sex ed and access to affordable birth control. Here's that link, scroll down to see the percentages:

http://www.urban.org/publications/310796.html

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Green!! It's totally preventable
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You have a good point! And i am glad you brought that up, but still those people who are paying for it were kids once too an they did stupid stuff too, so they shouldn't be so harsh
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I agree that there are better ways to get the point across than treating people like dirt. And I commend you for standing up for people.
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But the thing is, the people tell them they're trash and then preach about not getting an abortion!
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Oh that's wrong!! I would never call a girl trash or say abort it. That's wrong!! I believe adoption is their best bet. First off for the baby then the mother. Abortion is not a good thing. Tell her to ignore those people
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Wow nobody said that kid was trash! Just like u kept putting words in people's mouth! I see u still acting innocent! Can't wait till they find the comments u left showing how u really r Kendra
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Wow vanam, stop stalking me, and when they read those comments they'll know how passionate I am about my opinion and how I will back anybody up who went through what I did. The only reason I get so hard headed about this topic is because the people who say oh your pregnant at 13 are the ones who have no clue what they're saying or doing. That girl knows she messed up, and trust me she learned from her mistake, so why does she need a bunch of people who think they're they know more than her about knowing first how to run her life and second having a cow because she got pregnant! And dont say I'm putting word in other peoples mouths, because I that other post the first thing you said was its not a thing! It's a child, when in her question she says she dosent know what she's gonna do with the BABY! So you should probably stop. Before you really look dumb.
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Because people think that they are better than the person who they judge, but is not right because we are the same and everyone of us have feelings. we shal show respect to others

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greenthumbme

I personally try not to judge, since I don't know the whole story. For all I know, she could have been sexually assaulted. And I personally think its sad... There are so many peer pressures today and lack of direction from family that teens screw up.... Sometimes girls feel like that's the only love source they have, is bf's, so they'll do anything. That's not always the case, but like I said, I don't personally know. Image all those cruel judgmental stares they must get all day everyday. I have found myself thinking for a second wow.... She's way too young... But I try and stop it there.

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I think some people look upon it as irresponsible behavior, and now the person needs to prove they have learned from their mistakes. Please don't misinterpret me, I am not calling the baby a mistake, I am calling her actions a mistake. One with HUGE consequences. Statically speaking she no longer has as bright a future. She will need to support her child, and spend less time on her education. She has just ended her childhood. I know you don't think of a teenager as a child, but they are.

Teenagers are not known for making the best decisions and now this teenager who chose to have sex is now pregnant or a parent. If they wore irresponsible enough to get pregnant, how can they be responsible enough to raise a child? Right or wrong, this is what is going thru some people's minds when they see a pregnant teen or a teen mom.

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Some ppl Just feel they can do better for them self

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its dumb and so are they, i understand half the people on here would most likely act the same way as others but i have a freind i loved for a long time, she got knocked up and im proud of her she has overcome so much stuff its crazy, same with the guy. he bulked up and is a freaking monster - this happened within 3 months, im proud and i have no idea what this has to do with ur question but i gusse i need to get this out even ifs its online and i hope u can take from this experience - just ignore it and people think they can do alot of stuff molest kids, abuse dogs and microwave cats. its all about perspectives

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you dont have to care about what people have to say live your life and have as much fun as you can possibly have..its your body and your life not thiers learn how to ignor ppl that judge cuz they arent the first or last ppl that are going to judge you

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Let's say girl dresses like a you know what, and always trying to get attention from guys and always flirts then I would say she had it comming. And she knows she would have if she didnt stop.

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That dosent mean that only those types of girls are the ones having sex. Some of them have boyfriends!
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You should never judge. Only God is God himself. Those who live in glass houses, throw the first stone

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JayG203

They judge them because they don't believe they are good people or will become anything. My cousin had a kid when she was 18 and not married and now they're married and doing very well for themselves.

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They are to busy worrying about other peoples life they should be thinking about their own instead of judging others. I dont understand. Everyone should worry about theirselves... the girls that have a baby right now that are teens they have parents to talk to them about that they dont need everyone else going to them

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The saddest part of all of this conversation is, no one seems to consider the child. It is not about the 'mistake', the public being judgmental,
or even the mother's future, it's about the child. Every child deserves to grow up in a loving home with a mother and a father, who can afford to support the child. Maybe what comes across as criticism is frustration and concern, knowing the future if an unplanned child of teen parents is very bleak.
I have a step-daughter whose boyfriend left her with two babies and moved across the country. Judgmental of her 'mistake'?, no, just sad for two children who will do without what they deserve. These teens simply need to realize temporary pleasure leads to permanent consequences.

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Because our society makes it seem like its ok to have sex at any age and the people with right minds should judge 12 and 16 year olds havin sex with any guy that breaths. Not to there face or not gossiping to others but in there mind everyone should habe a concious and judge younge teenage gorls who have underage premarital sex its sinful and wrong and if you say its ok than your sick.

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There Is Lots Of Sin People Make Them Every Day But If You Repent You Could Be Forgiven by God Easy. No Sin Is Worst Then The Other. and plus the bible said " be fruitful and mulitiple(<sp iKnow) "nothings wrong with having a baby. If They Wanna Get Married Young Then Let Them . IDC it aint me
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People are mean evil spitefully creatures, it's what we do.

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Because, there teenager!!! There going to be judged and it is not right from people to call them trashy. Before they had sex they knew what could happen so yes there going to be judge.Its Life, Ive Been Judged I Learned To Get Over It. #i hope i dont sound like an ass hole>!

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I am not saying i do but some people think they are a whore or somthing like that just bcuz they have sex with people.

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i dont judge there is no reason to judge im 17 and got my girl pregnant when we were both 16 now we are 17 and have a 7 month old daughter

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idk i dont like to jude people

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A person should always be respected, if they don't smear the values of LIFE itself, and are active at running down family values, but if they see that a mistake is a mistake, well, that's what it's about to recognize we all make mistakes, that's why Jesus Christ said,"In your patience posses ye your souls." "And why, behold the speck in your sister's eye, and ignore the plank that's in yours." "Judge not that you be not judge." "HE told the woman caught in adultery "go and SIN NO MORE, least a worst thing come upon you." "and if we don't forgive those that are Truly repented, neither will our Heavenly Father forgive us." Don't hold things over people for fun or to feel self righteous, but do speak LIFE, and not death, that the innocent fall not there into. Here, where no one is known, we give the advice that is Godly and not call evil, good nor Good, evil. When there is one that throws his perversion on people's faces, just to break Good Virtue for the selfish reason, that I don't see why not, and are as asp in a pit

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well its because in the first place when you are a teenager you shouldnt be having sex in the first place. then people thank your a slut because you got kknocked up. its all about first impression. in my preference i dont think there bad because they got nocked up.

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That can lead to a lot of heartache and struggle and it's better to get an education and a decent job before starting a family, but I'd spend as little time as possible with people who treat someone else like trash for any reason.

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you should not judge her shes human and every one makes mistakes so leave her alone instead of putting her down try to pick her help her and support her the best you can.

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people that judge so quickly often need something to make them feel more important or they have a complex (inferiority) . its usually about their issues not a mistake you made at a young age. and probably the only difference in you and them often is that they had sex too but didnnt get pregnant

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Well to me it doesnt matter if your 15or20 If you arent ready to bring a new life into this world and provide for them and protect them and teach them raise them to be successful adults and put them before yourself then.. yes it makes me angry! their is a reason they have birth control and condoms. I dont think a child who has no say should have a shitty life cus you wanted to get your rocks off! ''not you'' but its not my place or bissnas to judge but... ya I was thinking it!!!

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