No, if you're convinced that your spouse is lying and there's good proof. Simply being suspicious without proof is enough to poison your relationship, so it's wise to be absolutely sure of your grounds.
No, it's not wrong. If your spouse has broken the trust previously, you have the right to be cautious. The spouse really has no grounds to be upset about it because they are the one that created the air of mistrust. They have to own the situation until the trust can be restored.
2 years ago
Last edited at 1:48PM on 9/3/2011
ugh! its the lying to your spouse part thats wrong. if you really need proof i say go for it. just dont get too caught up in the lies -it can make you crazy. decide what you are willing to live with and what you are not. dont make threats you are not willing to keep (ie if you dont stop doing "x" im going to leave you). ultimately only you can make yourself happy -dont rely 100% on your spouse to make you happy.
not being able to trust your spouse is a sucky place to be. it takes a minute to destory and a long time to rebuild. communication is key. so keep talking to each other.
2 years ago
Last edited at 2:04PM on 9/3/2011
I used the kids to keep an eye on Daizy.
One guy who had a crush on her used to sell fruit door-to-door. He was a simple, friendly, country guy but Daizy wasn't hard on the eyes, and he was always looking for an excuse to stay and chat. This led to a lot of banter around the place about "Mum's boyfriend."
One evening when I arrived home from work one of the kids said, "The fruit man was here today, Dad.
I tried to sound angry. "How long did he stay?
"I dunno. They made us go to the park and play."
But, seriously, if you think he's lying to you then you absolutely MUST check up, for your own peace of mind. The other side of the equation is that if you're a jealous sort of person and are only imagining things, it might drive a wedge between you. Talk to a close friend and see what they think.
Heck no!! Go find out everything and document it! I had the same happen to me and because I documented so much I won custody and alimony! Sorry to hear you're going through this- keep your head up and have faith!!