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My discovery .. we live in a society where commitment is not valued. To much emphasis on immediate gratification and results. There are exceptions and I truly applaud you.. But for me it will be along time spent in reflection and contemplation before a friendship will evolve into romance.
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GaryPugsley:
7 months ago
Take lots of time to get to know her or him Make sure you both have similar values and goals and especially how you will handle money
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JollyRogre:
7 months ago
via iPhone
Gary, what's your idea of "lots of time?"
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GaryPugsley:
7 months ago
Now that is a hard one to answer and I don't think I can since everyone is different. I was young and my ex was much older and wiser I might add so there were a lot of red flags but I did not want to see them.
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AnnieZhu:
7 months ago
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Last edited at 11:37PM on 10/27/2012
This lesson we should learn is that it is not because of his/her fault that we got divorced, we just met each other in the wrong environment, wrong time and wrong place. It is our society's fault.
I mean to tell this seriously, everybody is just perfect, they are just not able to do or continue sometimes.
Only when we are able to learn this lesson could we continue to find our happiness and even keep very good memory for him/her.
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AnnieZhu:
7 months ago
More or less, but it is important for us to change our environment. Then we can find a better way for him/her.
We are not able to continue because we are not able to change our environment for him/her (any more), or we never thought of change our environment, but only blame him/her, how could we continue?
We might never know why he/she feel bad... we need to be positive in our society, right?
We are not able to continue because we are not able to change our environment for him/her (any more), or we never thought of change our environment, but only blame him/her, how could we continue?
We might never know why he/she feel bad... we need to be positive in our society, right?
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JollyRogre:
7 months ago
via iPhone
Annie, I read your website (all of it!) and now your comments. Is it possible you're over-analyzing things?
I'm just curious. :-)
I'm just curious. :-)
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AnnieZhu:
7 months ago
No, I don't think so, maybe I have written in great detail, but I only want to tell a very simple way we all have to obey.
It is because it is too hard for me to get help from our society for over the year, I don't think I am able to write less to persuade our society.
Thank you since you have read all of it! :p
It is because it is too hard for me to get help from our society for over the year, I don't think I am able to write less to persuade our society.
Thank you since you have read all of it! :p
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JollyRogre:
7 months ago
via iPhone
I'm a super-nerd, so I read it because it was interesting. However, I couldn't always decipher what each point was.
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JollyRogre:
7 months ago
via iPhone
So what was the one thing you learned from your divorce? Could he have been more patient, listened more? Could you have been less intense?
I'm just curious what others have leaned. :-D
I'm just curious what others have leaned. :-D
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AnnieZhu:
7 months ago
Thank you if you think it is interesting. It is so long and you can't read through unless you are interested in it.
It was not so meaningful for both of us to keep the marriage, for I could not think of a child then, and actually the hallucination also instructed me to get divoice with him, it meant that things could continue if I divorce.
It was not so meaningful for both of us to keep the marriage, for I could not think of a child then, and actually the hallucination also instructed me to get divoice with him, it meant that things could continue if I divorce.
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JollyRogre:
7 months ago
via iPhone
Do you realize just how many certifiably 'crazy' people are out there, and functioning just fine?! I think the majority of people are loco in one way or another, but they cope. And they find people that love and support them emotionally, which makes all the difference.
Perhaps I'm wrong, but it sounds like you define yourself by your problem, than in spite of it.
Kinda like always looking at what you don't have, instead of what you do have. ( no offense intended.)
Perhaps I'm wrong, but it sounds like you define yourself by your problem, than in spite of it.
Kinda like always looking at what you don't have, instead of what you do have. ( no offense intended.)
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AnnieZhu:
7 months ago
You are really a super-nerd.
I am not always looking at what I don't have. But I have to be able to do the same way with a healthy persons to get rid of my worries, while my findings are that no one could do this way when they are facing a person who was suffering schizophrenia. Without this way, our world will turn into disorder at once!
The most important is that we could to do something we want to do in our world. I hope I am able to let our society to understand this secret.
When we start to do something in our world, we start to show our value in our society, we attract our friends or lover naturally. I don't think we could just find our friends or lover. We have friends because of our sense of value in our society.
I am not always looking at what I don't have. But I have to be able to do the same way with a healthy persons to get rid of my worries, while my findings are that no one could do this way when they are facing a person who was suffering schizophrenia. Without this way, our world will turn into disorder at once!
The most important is that we could to do something we want to do in our world. I hope I am able to let our society to understand this secret.
When we start to do something in our world, we start to show our value in our society, we attract our friends or lover naturally. I don't think we could just find our friends or lover. We have friends because of our sense of value in our society.
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JollyRogre:
7 months ago
via iPhone
You bet I'm a super nerd!
After my final injury in the fire dept, I went to college and got two degrees. Mathematics and Engineering.
I even have a pocket protector on my jammies.
After my final injury in the fire dept, I went to college and got two degrees. Mathematics and Engineering.
I even have a pocket protector on my jammies.
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don't marry a douch bag
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JollyRogre:
7 months ago
via iPhone
Funny. What about the details? Anything you'd pass on to others?
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every situation is different and can't be applied to all. don't get too comfortable though. in the begining you try to look your best, show positive qualities, do things for each other,then after a while you start to slack. show your partner love and respect everyday.
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also i am guilty myself of expecting or wanting the "great love story" like the lifetime movies where the man will shout from the rooftops to decair his love after walking 3 days in a blizzard for a woman. it's not always realistic and thats ok
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mdavisson:
7 months ago
via iPhone
Ppl can overtime grow apart from one another no different from how they grew together n fell in love
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JollyRogre:
7 months ago
via iPhone
Any ideas how to avoid growing apart? What would have worked for you?
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mdavisson:
7 months ago
via iPhone
I believe ppl change as they get older..and that just how it is meant to be ..I am with my second wife married 5 together 13...1 st wife married 18 together 7... We got married aftr being away from each other for a year due to the army...and when we got married moved back together over that time I just think we both grew to different ways ... I don't believe it's a Controlable thing unless ur willing to be unhappy.
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I was never married or divorced but i did live with a lady for awhile .......
My advice be sure get to know her because if you marry the wrong person its going to be a nightmare
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JollyRogre:
7 months ago
via iPhone
What's your idea of a nightmare? Your experience?
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Im just saying that if you marry the wrong girl its going to be bad
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PoisonIvyLeo :
7 months ago
via Android
Don't waste years trying to fix some one who will not change their ways. There's no excuse for bad behavior in a relationship. Also never lose ones self for some one elses joy. It's a hard thing to get back.
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But the romantic in me believes in sappy endings, so I'm always trying to learn a little more than I knew yesterday...