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Me and my stepson don't get along and he is 19 years old and ruining my marriage what should I do

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If he's 19, he's old enough to live on his own. You might want to suggest that he look into it. You might also mention it to your spouse.

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I agree with you 100% these days the 19 yr old generation NOT ALL but a big BUT are spoiled rotten and have nothing else better to do with their life so they get into others business! its a damn shame to! ! as long and you and ur wife know the problem is the stepson you can get threw this together! as mentioned by others... the stepson needs to get a job...and he is old enough to move out! good luck with this one! so unfair!" jealousy is a nightmare! !
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Get a Family counselor

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follow me mare
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I like your political views!!!
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Ok
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it depends, what exactly do you believe the issue is? jealousy? maybe his personality doesnt click with yours? Past bad experience? You think maybe hes feeling neglected by his biological parent now that your in the picture?

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Stepchildren are very capable of destroying a marriage with very little effort. It is too bad that his father does not get involved to become a peacemaker. You need to be fully honest with your husband to see if he is interested in salvaging your marriage. You cannot solve it alone and the longer the friction goes on, the more permanent the damage will be.

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He has a job and he keeps telling his dad he is going to move out but he sleeps all day when he isn't working and do you think he should have a certain amount of time to move out and how much time should he give him
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That is an answer that must be determined and enforced by his father. In the eyes of his son, what you say doesn't count because you are not his mother. His father must become assertive and set a date and stick to it.
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Definantly don't do something and not tell your spose because the kid's parents should know about this and your husband /wife would get super P.O.ed if they knew you did something involving their kid but yeah i for kicking him out a counsler is a waste of money if you can just kick him out

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I think what marebear said is the best... That way your spouse realizes that you are trying.. and if the stepson dont want to go then you talk to your spouse about getting him out because he dont even want to try and work on it ;))

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Talk it over with your husband, but I think the stepson should move out.

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When you get married, part of your vows state that you put your spouse first, before others. If your husband/wife is allowing this 19 yr old to disrespect you or puts the boy before you, then they're not honoring their vows. So, you have to work this out with your mate. To stop the son's behavior you two MUST be united on behavior expections. You two need to let the son know you're married, and he better respect this. If your spouse won't do this, or puts the kid before you, you'll have some decisions to make. Good luck.

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Thanks
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You're very welcome.
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He is now an adult if he can accept your relationship tell him to get the fudge out. U gotta let go at some point

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