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Been with my husband for 4 years always hits me when he gets mad.

if I trigger a argument and it escalades up to a huge fight then he either abuses me physically or verbally. I need support right now it just happened in front of my young kids im helpless. plz some good advice

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ClaraListensprechen

Let me guess--he's of the opinion that you're always the one who triggers an argument and it's never anything he's done.

Here's what to do:

1. Do research first--locate the nearest women's shelter and get their phone number. This is in case you need to leave as part of an emergency. Keep a means with you of calling 911 at all times.

2. Don't ever let on that you're considering a Plan B like this because among men with violent streaks, you could put your life in jeopardy if he knows and you're not yet ready.

3. Ready a "go bag" of personal maintenance items and if he asks about it, say that it's recommended for natural disasters such as Sandy or a tornado. I have one myself because I live near a railroad which regularly carries toxic materials, and it's in case of evacuation because of a derailment.

4. After doing 1, 2, and 3, find an opportunity to visit the police office in person and have a confidential chat with an officer, and tell him about your situation so that IF you need to dial 911, they'll already have a background on any domestic disturbance you're calling about.

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ClaraListensprechen
I'm serious. Your man might never get to the level of lethality, but too many have and too many women have died because of it. You need to get the blazes out of there.
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file a divorce right away, dont waste your time with him.

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Get in touch with the battered women's association of America they WILL help you through this starting from the lowest low. Good luck.

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Call the police they can help you. Throw his a$$ in jail!

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First thing get you and your children to a safe environment, you will defiantly get some info. And choices on where to seek help from the Police when you call them. You must call 911 when this happens, if you are not able to, teach your children how to do it.

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Love does not leave bruises! Look in your phone book for battered women's shelters. Again phone book; under mental health counseling. Formulate a plan to leave. Remember, almost all things can be replaced eventually, your life cannot. If your children continue to see this you will be perpetuating the legacy of abuse. Most of all if you don't want him to have unsupervised custody of the kids there has to be a paper trail of the abuse. If nothing else GO TALK TO A COUNSELOR NOW! Clara has god advice on this topic.

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You need to get out while you can !

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Nobody should go through physical or mental abuse. Try and find help to get away.

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Get your bags and the kids' bags packed, get out, call the police, they will also help you find a place to stay if you don't have one. http://www.livestrong.com/article/100480-four-stages-abusive-relationship/

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What state are you in.....

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Get out of that relationship, one of my mums friends had a husband like that and he hurt his kids , we didn't know until we found out the child was beaten to death.

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I am so so so sorry!!!
Get some help
Talk to a friend.

You are worth it some other man will treat you like a princess.
That's not a man

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