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Buttercup_

Why do I feel like I don't deserve to be depressed?

sorry if this is long :/

so ever sence 2010 my life spiraled out or control and now in what is almost 2013 I'm kinda depressed and i just don't feel like i deserve it, there are people out there that have it 10 20 50x worse then me and so I just don't feel like I have a good reason to be depressed, this is why i'm depressed, my parents fight from the time my dad gets home from work until the time everyone goes to bed, I'm homeschooled and have been my whole life, and i'm anti social because of it, i use to take art and dance class but i felt out of place, because I was the only one that didn't talk about what i learned in school today, and I'm not good with people so I never made any friends, I haven't signed back up for almost a year and a half, for that reason and because I have pretty bad anxiety, I have a friend now but I'm not really into talking about my feelings so we usually just have fun and stuff, but that's not all, my mother has a bit of a problem with drinking, she has been getting drunk every night for as long as I can remember, and me and my sister had to deal with it alone for a year,

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Try traditional buddhism, it worked for me. I used to be as suicidal as they come until I figured out that my suffering was my problem and fixed it.

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BoxingTally

That is low self-esteem. You feel what you feel and it's ok. It would be wrong to make yourself happy through someone else's hardship anyway. Reading your question, I think it is natural for you to be depressed and you shouldn't feel as though you are being self-indulgent. I really think you need to reach out to people, however uncomfortable it makes you, including your mother. She may need help.

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you need to find someone who you can talk to and open up with, the first step to solving all problems in life is a healthy conversation, whether it be with yourself, God, or another person, you do have reasons to be sad, but there is always a reason to push on and be happy, i was suicidal once, but i found out that there were people, just waiting to help me up, find those people who will help you, and you will find the solution to all your problems

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no one deserves to be depressed, and your making it seem as if its something that is earned...depression comes in many different levels like myself i probably had it worse cause i used to detach myself from human contact however with treatment i am way better :D...also you have every right to be depressed 1) your not as social as an average person (not your fault) 2) your environment is not the best but what i suggest is taking some sort of activity with your friend like possibly do art together again and also venting about your feelings helps :) sometimes all we need is someone to listen so you could always try that...also talk to to your doctor about this depression you have cause it can be treated. Just stay strong you can get through it whenever you feel down just find a positive outlet whether it be writing,drawing,singing,dancing...etc Or you can always email me if you wanna talk about anything (its on my profile :D) hope you feel better :P and also just know your not alone

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First of all you are not alone in dealing with your problem your sister is there and you are a very very brave young person my hat is off to you my husband grew up in this type of unhealthy environment his mother was
And is a closet addict the family never talked about it the father tried to get her to stop and they fought everyday in front of the 4 boys my husband lived with same thing his whole life and like he always felt he was never good enough he is a police officer 1/2 of the children of alcoholics or addicts become alcoholics or addicts also they become either policemen,firemen,emergency room nurse because as children you learned how to not react to drama you keep a cool head when things got crazy and out of control and since this is what you have grown up with your comfortable in this medium pls ask for help if not for you then to save your sister your dad is unable to do it he is to close to the problem I hope this helped go to a family member just leave because nothing will change your mom will not get help with out rehab and she will lie and do anything she can not to go you can't save your mom or dad they are grown up save yourself and your sister and maybe by you be remove it will force both of them into treatment which is the only way thing will change

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You are right there are probably a few people that have it worse than you. That doesn't mean you should be ok with feeling bad. Those are your thoughts and feelings and we all have a right to feel how we feel. Like others have said, find someone you can talk to. I used to be like that and not share my feelings or tell people my problems. I met someone that I started talking to and she had different ideas and a different way of looking at things. It's hard to open up but when you do most people are willing to help and give good advise. Who knows maybe they can give you a different way of looking at things to. Just try and be positive and positive will come back to you :0). I hope thing get better for you and stay strong.

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Its ok to feel the way u do, theres obviously a reason for it, otherwise u wouldnt be feeling it. I think it may prove beneficial in the long run if you dont put too much faith in getting support from ur parents- ur mum OR dad. Dont feel like u have to "save" ur sister either, just stick together. You 2 will probably end up being very close all your life- if she feels the way u do. Im including ur dad also coz it may not be all ur mums fault that she's an alcoholic- but nonetheless its still a very selfish trait, and its a shame she tries to ignore her responsibilities. Trying to keep yourself occupied n happy is the most important thing, because its too big a gamble to try to rely on anyone else to do it. The only absolute way that u can expect for it to maintain is if u do it yourself- because u will never leave you, or unexpectedly let u down. I agree that u definitely cant save ur mum or dad.

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Their problems have developed over time, n they are parents now, n instead of dwelling on their problems, they should have been focusing more on their childrens upbringing. They made their bed, u dont have to lay in it also, just focus on making ur own life. It will only make u feel helpless and frustrated if u try to fix them, n if they cant even get their act together at their age, its hard to imagine that they will be able to support u emotionally as u get older n need life direction. Im not trying to make u resent ur parents, I just wish someone had told me this when I was younger, coz it would have saved me a whole lot of grief.
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