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I need help. Girls answer please, but boys opinions are okay.

I have been dealing with depression for years now and i get called ugly and fat everyday. my dad doesn't help much (if you read my bio you would know why) because he is really sad and doesn't talk to me that much. I'm anorexic and I cut. I really want to stop and I try to bit I just can't. I have no friends. I only think my boyfriends go out with me because they are sorry for me. I've tried to just stop all together and eat but I feel discussing when I eat. I've gone to therapy and a councilor but they don't help. I've transferred schools a lot but it just happens again. I need help on how to stop and how to handle it. I've tried ignoring it and not letting it get to me but it does. my dad always told me that my mom always said "sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me" but why I like to say is "sticks and stones may break my bones but your words tear me apart" please help. I'm running out of ideas an the only one I have now is suicide is the only option I have even though I know it's never the answer. please help me. P.S the reason I wanted only girls to answer is because I thought some of them would maybe know what I'm going through.

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icic6772

First of all: STOP HURTING YOURSELF!!!!!!!!! What does it accomplish. Second: there is no way that you are fat or ugly. If you are the older girl in that picture you are absolutely gorgeous. And I'm not just saying that. If you weren't I wouldn't have even mentioned it. Third: I'm so so so so sorry about your brother. I understand why your dad doesn't want you to go out, you're all he has and he doesn't want to lose you. What you need to do is talk to an actual person. Not someone who's job it is to "fix" you. Please start eating again. Trust me you are FAR from disgusting. If you ever need to talk to someone talk to me. I love talking to people and listening to their emotional problems :)

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Thank you sooo much. I really needed to hear that from someone, even if its someone I don't know.
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You should be a therapist :)
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icic6772
I wish I could just give you a big hug!!!!! And trust me those boys are NOT going out with you because they feel sorry for you. You are stunning!!
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icic6772
You think so? I kinda like talking to people in a more personal and emotional level instead of a professional level.
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I need serious help don't I? All these comments really made my day and guess what? I just ate for the first time in a month.
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icic6772
Good!! Listen sweetie you are beautiful! I'm an 18 year old boy just a year older than you just so you know. And I think that you are a wonderful person too and the very last thing I want is for something bad to happen to you. Please talk to me when ever you want! :D
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Okay I will
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icic6772
I wish I could just give you a BIG HUG!!!!!
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icic6772
Are you still there??
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I need one:(
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icic6772
C'mon your worrying me!!
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I'm here but I'm going to bed.
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Great answer!
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icic6772
She hasn't said anything for a while. Do you think she's okay?
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icic6772
Oh. Okay. You really had me worried. And the fact that your comments don't show up for like 20 minutes for some reason doesn't help. So lets talk tomorrow.
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Idk.... I feel so bad though :/
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icic6772
Yeah. Lets talk to her tomorrow. Night.
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Are you on?
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icic6772
Yes! How are you?
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icic6772
What's up?
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icic6772
Are you there?
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I'm here sorry. I cut again today. It's really deep.
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icic6772
STOP DAMN IT!!!!!!!!
If you keep on hurting yourself then I'm not even going to try to help you. I want to help you but you have to stop cutting yourself. What is it accomplishing?!
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icic6772
The more you hurt yourself the more I fell like I'm not making a difference.
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icic6772
I hope she's okay. She hasn't said anything in a while.
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There are so many things going on inside my head. So many things you won't understand. All those insecurities so don't try to tell me that I'm having a bad day, because its been going on for so much longer. The tears, the desperate cries for help that no one seems to hear. I just slip sometimes and I can't cover it up as well as I used to. I'm running out of strength and its getting harder and harder to keep it all in and hold on.
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icic6772
You know if you don't want me to help you I'm not going to.
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look my gf went though the same thing but she got though it. if u want my opinion i say to tell the people to leave you alone and think about yourself in a good way :) (p.s ill be your friend)

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Thanks I need a friend:)
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just know that something good is on its way and i know what your going through sucide is such a stupid decision you should just keep your head held high and dont care what anyone says

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But I've tried to not care but deep inside I do and it just builds up until I just want to let go.
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just know that everything happens for a reason everything is going to get better but sucide is soooooo stupid
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Well I'm not a girl, but I have three! beauty is in the eye of the beholder. all women-girls are simply gorgeous in their own way! don't you ever let anyone tell you any different God makes everyone from his own image and he makes no mistakes. talk to someone about your depression, life has so much to offer someone as young and as beautiful as you are.

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Thanks for calling me beautiful.
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icic6772
She is right?!
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I don't know what you're going threw but I know someone who does his name is Jesus he will help you threw this. Suicide is not the answer:( you will hurt alot of people by doing that. Please go to a Christian pastor or atleast pray and I am too god bless

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I'm not That religion though. I'm Lutheran
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It's ok hun, talk to god tell him to make you see the real you beautiful
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I just can't hold on anymore I just can't. God knows I've tried but I. Just. Can't.
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Well I'm a guy and I know and understand what you're going through and kinda felt the same way. But if I were you, I'd just try to ignore it and focus on the important stuff, and if you want, find other therapists. Just stay strong. And maybe put music in your ears so you don't hear what bad things are being said. Don't know if I helped but I tried, oh yeah and keep praying to god and stuff like that

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Your decisions effect more people than just your self... that's what i got to say.

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But it will effect no one except my dad and sometimes I didn't think he cares about me.
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Trust me, you never know who you will effect until it is too late
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icic6772
Why wouldn't he care about you? Give me an example.
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I know but I try and try to hold on but sometimes I just can't.
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He couldn't care about me because he ignores me and always yells at me and I just feel unwanted and unloved. My brother was always the favorite and I know that.
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icic6772
Awww poor baby. I wish I could help more. But all I have are words.
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Hey go read the comment I put on your answer.
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icic6772
I have.
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icic6772
Hold on. It isn't up yet. I'll respond as soon as it does. I promise!!!
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Wow i got alot of comments on this... :o
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Minji

I don't even know how to properly respond to this....You just seem so similar to me...Find someone to talk to, it can be anyone. Just find someone you can trust. You don't ever want to commit suicide, you might think that you'll escape. It's true that your pains will be gone forever but everyone that might have truly cared for you is now suffering just as much, because they know they could have done something. The feeling right before you die, isn't a feeling of escaping..it's the most terrifying thing to happen. Don't think that people don't care about you or that thought will destroy you. Trust me on this, find a friend or someone to talk to, and cry your heart out to them. Good luck and stay strong kid <3 <3!!

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Thanks but I have tried to commit suicide before and right when I was about to, I felt like everything was going to stop. Like all this hav would stop. Then my friend walked in and saved me. I came back that time but what if next time, I don't.
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icic6772
Don't try it again!!!! Someone as nice as you doesn't deserve that.
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Minji
I've tried committing suicide also, and each time put me in the hospital. I've cut where I was sent to the hospital, I've tried hanging myself, I've drank bleach, Ive tried drowning myself more times than I can count, I even tried jumping from a building. Sure, I was exaggerating when I said its terrifying. But it is scary seeing everyone around you bawling their eyes out and trying to keep you alive, when you know that you caused this. When you die, you don't want to be known as a coward or do you...?
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I don't care if I'm known as a coward. I just want all this to end. I almost frank bleach.
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Omg I'm dying! I meant drank not frank haha! I needed a good laugh
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icic6772
Lol... I guess.
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I just want to die.
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Literally die.
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Just end it all. Right here right now.
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Minji
You really don't want to drink bleach, it's poisonous and the worst feeling ever. I can't say if you have a true reason to commit suicide...but in my opinion you don't have a reason at all, everyone goes through struggles, some even go through worse stuff and make it through those rough times. You don't want to be that one aunt in the photo album that committed suicide. *sigh* I'm sorry if I sound heartless....
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icic6772
DON'T YOU DARE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What will that accomplish?!
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Please go read my bio. You will know I will never be an aunt. I will never be anything. You will never truly know what I go through. Thus is the worst felling ever. It's worse than being punched in the boob and that hurts like a bitch (excuse my language) I just want to let go and never see them again.
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Just go read my bio.
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icic6772
I'm so sorry for your loss. But you still have so many things to look forward to in life.
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Minji
I did read it and I do know what you go through..No, my brother didn't die but my mother and father were killed in an accident and just recently my sister died of cancer. I'm not going to be a hypocrite and say you shouldn't try to commit suicide because I tried it so many times. I know it's hard but you have to get through it. I have friends that committed suicide and I wish that I could have helped in some way...but now I can help you..Your father needs you, he shouldn't suffer anymore.
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But he makes mr suffer too. I really don't want to leave him like this but I just want to be with my brother again. He was the only one that truly cared. Trust me, I'm not trying to be like poor me I'm bullied like everyone else that ever existed! But I still just need some help
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icic6772
What would your brother think if he saw you like this? Do you think he would want you to kill yourself?
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Minji
How does he make you suffer?
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He makes me suffer by drinking and it just effects me in a way you wouldn't believe
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Minji
My mother was an alcoholic, she was always drunk, I don't remember a time when she wasn't. I understand how it affects a person. If you die your father is going to die too, you're all he has left. Don't be stupid.
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Just remember its not a about him. Just because I'm the only one he has left doesn't mean I've stopped suffering. It doesn't mean he still doesn't care about me. It doesn't mean I still just want all thus to end. It doesn't mean everything. I need to think about myself to and how this effects me.
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icic6772
She hasn't said anything for a while. Do you think she's okay?
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Minji
Yep, I don't think she did anything.....hopefully... :-/
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icic6772
Poor baby. I think she needs a big hug.
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icic6772
She's okay!!
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Btw you are sooo pretty
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And I don't hate you because you are atheist!!!! I'm Lutheran.
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you need to get to know jeses, he will be with you no matter what.

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Oh my gosh, this is so hard to answer:/ it sounds very heavy, and very hard and I'm so sorry you have to go through this. Looking at your profile picture, and I am not just saying this to make you feel better, you are gorgeous! Seriously! Whoever is calling you ugly, as cliche as it sounds, is probably jealous. Or, they have low-self esteem, and project it onto you. People that are happy, and love themselves, generally reflect and project that onto others, because really, our outward actions are simply a reflection of how we often feel inside. But I know no matter the reason, those words still hurt. When they say it, don't take it in, don't think about why they might be saying it, why you think it may or may not be true, just completely reject it at all from even entering your mind. Try and replace all the negative thoughts in your head, with nice ones. Write down a list of things you like about yourself. Look in the mirror before school every day, and tell yourself you look great, and that you're going to do your best today. As far as eating, when you're hungry, please eat! Or eat at least three times a day. Eat healthy. I had an eating disorder when I was about 13 or 14. luckily, I got help before any real damage could start, but still, it's not worth it! The amount of damage that can be done to your body, the emotional tool, is just not worth it. And as for cutting, I don't cut, but my brother use to. He did stop though, and so can you! find other outlets to release your pain.
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You might want to try and talk to your mom about this as well. And pray. You don't need to go through this alone. He loves you, and He hears you.

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My mom left when I was only 2. Read my bio. I stated cutting when my brother......
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Oh. I'm sorry :( I read it, but I must've read it too fast. Who do you live with then?
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Oh... I had to re-read it... I'm so sorry :/ I thought it was your dad, not your brother... Is there no one you are close to, that you can talk to?
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Not really. Just my friend who saved me from suicide last year but she moved. My boyfriend isn't that close to me either.
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Wow. I'm so sorry. I wish there was something I could say or do to help.... Have you ever tried or heard of support groups or support circles? People in a group talk and discuss their problems with eachother, and it's usually for people going through similar things. Sometimes that helps people, sometimes not... But maybe you could try?
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Okay.....
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Everything is held confidential, too. And you could even end up making new friends:) maybe you just need a job, as well. My brother has depression, and he takes medicine for it, and he works. Sometimes working keeps your mind off yourself. If I'm not busy, personally, I'll not only feel bored, but slightly depressed. I need something to preoccupy myself. Maybe practice some of your talents, as well.
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Well you know that if you ever need a girl friend talk I'm here for you but don't harm yourself everyone gets picked on I have self confidence and stuff and I still get picked on kids are just jealous of there victims that there bullying and you know you have to break out of your shell that's the only way your gonna make friends and don't let bullying get to your head!!! I had suicadle thoughts when I was about 9 or 10 but I kinda just stepped back and realized its not worth getting upset over it wasn't that bad but it was only a little not to tht point my parents always tell me no matter where you go there's always gonna be mean people hope it helps <3 :) you know life isn't easy but everything happens for a reason

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I does get to my head. You don't know how hard thus is for me.
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Ya I know and I have been bullied I'm now grown up I'm almost 14 not quiete there but you know be the bigger person don't feel like the littler person you are such a beautiful person just don't do it :(
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And I read your bio I know what it's like to loss someone I lost my grandpa a couple months ago and then I lost my uncle at 4 so no ones life is a walk in the park and just know everything happens for a reason
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Sure life is a walk in a park but I got lost in a forest with no way out but dying. You really don't understand. My brother was my ONLY friend. And when I say that I'm not lying.
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Awww I'm sorry you know life is hard I'm sorry i really don't understand it's just that I had always had friends but at some pionts I dont
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I'm sorry I even awnserd this
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It's fine it really helped:)
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i think i have a way you can stop cutting (: it helped me recover when i used to cut. go for as many days as you can without cutting, even if its just one day. then next time try and beat that record and go one more day without cutting and the next day you can cut again. do this until you feel you have no more need to cut. i really hope this helps you as much as it helped me. i know what you're going through and i know how much it sucks. but please stay strong ! i was pretty messed up but if i can recover, there's no way you cant. you already seem stronger and smarter than me because you put up this question asking for help. just please, don't kill yourself. you definitely are beautiful and don't let anyone else tell you other wise. i hope i helped at least a little and you will be in my prayers (:

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Somebody else said they'd put a butterfly on their wrists, as to not kill the butterflies... But I'm not a cutter so I don't know how effective that would be.
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oh yes she can try that too ^^ its called The Butterfly Project. you draw a butterfly on your wrist, name it after someone you love or care about and you have to let it fade away naturally. no scrubbing or rubbing, but if you cut before it fades away, you kill the butterfly.
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I've tried to drink bleach but my friend saved me.
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@morgan-yea don't do that!
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Hello, lovely. I just want you to know that life has it's ups and downs. Everyone has to face bad times where it seems like the only option is to quit. But I want you think about the future. If you decide to go through with suicide you will miss out on so many opportunities. You will miss out on finding the love of your life, having a beautiful wedding, having children who look up to you as their hero, living with your love and growing old with whoever it is. Right now, things may seem rough, but you have to focus on the brighter future. You have to see what is in store for you. It may seem far away because of everything that is happening right now, but be patient. What is coming for you is well worth the wait. You will be happy that you didn't quit. I love you.

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This has been going on since 2nd grade. It never got better and it never will.
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If that's what you believe, then it will be. I, a stranger on the internet, can do nothing to change your mind. It is completely up to you to decide that things will change. I believe that things will change and get better for you. Now you need to believe that too.
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Dying is the easiest way out for me. No one will ever truly know what this does to me.
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No, I'm not saying you need to get out. I'm saying you need to persevere and push through this. I'm telling you, things will get better. I don't care how much you refuse to believe it right now, you will be happy. And you are right. No one understands what you are going through. I sure don't. I am just here, trying to tell you that you can be happy if you decide to be. And you should never want to die. Go outside and take a walk. Look around at the trees and birds and clouds and sun. You really want to give all of that up?
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Yes because it looks all black in my eyes.
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icic6772
I wish I could just hold you in my arms and tell you that everything will be okay.
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^This guy has the right idea.
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I want you to also.
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icic6772
I know. You would think girls would like sensitive guys.
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icic6772
I would totally treat you right. I'd respect you and comfort you when you're feeling bad like this.
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I do
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icic6772
Check out my profile.
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Somewhere someone has got it worse then you. As bad as life gets suicide is never or should never be an option. You aren't the only one who's ever been insulted, sad, hungry, out of shape, judged, ect. If the people you surround yourself with aren't there for you or support you then I suggest surrounding yourself with new people. Or no one at all until you figure everything out. Take care of you, find out what you want then go and do/get it. No excuses. No self pitty or resentment. You call do all things through God. You're never alone. People who have never and will never meet you, care. I wish you the best and hope you make the right decision as far as seeing the potential in life rather then the "poor me" easy way out.

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No one has it worse. No one truly noes what in going through. I left a lot out of the question because It would get removed.......
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icic6772
Like what? Please tell me.
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It will get removed I swear.
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icic6772
Then put it quick.
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icic6772
Why would it get removed?
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Because its really bad.
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icic6772
How bad?
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It is really bad. I can't even explain how bad it is.
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icic6772
Is it about something that someone did to you?
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No? No one did anything to me.
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icic6772
Then why would it be bad? Just say it
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I really can't. I don't want to talk about it.
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icic6772
Sweetheart if you want to get over it you have to talk about it.
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Talk to someone, leave a note for them telling them your problems. Anyone. If for some reason that doesn't work, I think you need to first try to stop being anorexic, set a goal, perhaps a waistline measurement you want to reach as you slowly begin to eat more, and set a time that you want to reach this goal. It can be months away, or even years, just try to stay with it. Remember, there are always people who love you.

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SikaRose

Listen. There are people out there who feel very sorry for you, they'd like to help, but let's be honest. They cannot help you. Why? Because they don't know what they're feeling. They can only help you help yourself. They aren't inside your head. They don't know your thoughts. But realize that all the strength that you need is really inside of you. You just need other people to try to help you. I have friends who have the same problem with food and depression. Believe me, I'm the one begging them not to commit suicide on the phone as they stand on the roof. Now with people telling you suicide isn't worth it (it's true by the way) it won't always make much effect on you. When you're depressed....suicide seems so appealing. No matter what others say. It just becomes such a real option, and so tempting. When you're feeling this, no matter what, get in a group of people who love you. Even random strangers helps. Let's just say it's a lot harder to hang yourself in a large group of people who would try to stop you.

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SikaRose
You can't keep everything locked up inside! If you aren't already, I strongly recommend keeping a journal. It's a way of expressing yourself without hurting yourself. And on good days, you can look back on your journal, on all those negative thoughts you wrote down, and think....look how far I've come. And on the bad days, you look back at the times you felt inspiration, and think...Someday I'll be ok. I know this is only a bad day. It's really helped me. Sorry about the ranting:Know that no matter how people treat you, you're not what they say. Unless that's pretty.Remember to add some humor into your day ^^^ Find something that completely distracts you. If it lets you forget for an hour or so, use it. Remember there are people who want you here, who care about you. And realize that you secretly want to stay here too.
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SikaRose
Sorry my message was too long :P
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You are very true. That us basically exactly what I'm feeling.
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That was amazing. I needed that.
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This is a good answer:) we can only offer sympathy and advice, but only she can help herself.
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SikaRose
You know you have a lot of people you could talk to. I personally don't like talking to therapists or adults in general. I always feel like they treat me like I'm not an individual, and they don't try to understand me for me. I've never talked to them in person, only online, but that's because my parents don't know. And hopefully they never will. I've basically given up on telling people, just because I know they won't understand, and it can be dissapointing, especially if they judge. And with my dad.......yeah. It won't go well. Anyway, I think it's better to talk to a stranger. You won't be afraid to hurt feelings, and you can't lose much, because it's easy to find another stranger. :P Anyway, I don't suffer from eating dissorders and I'm only 13, but you know. Better than nothing. It's probably better to talk to someone who deals with depression, but doesn't deal with the same problem. I found (it's really weird) that it almost comes a competition who has the worst case of it, and it just turns into a lot of drama. It's not fun. So yeah, there is my little piece of advice. Do with it what you please.
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Hey you are very pretty and I know how you feel more then you know and I felt the same way two years ago but somthing got me thru and I know a lot of ppl don't believe me but Jesus Christ helped me and now I am soo much better now:) and when ppl call you names they are very very wrong because you are gorgeous.:) and wish I could be friends with you in person because you are very very sweet person and hope you feel better soon I know I have never met you but I wish I could::::::::))))))))))))))

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I wish we could too.
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icic6772
I wish I could meet her too.!!
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You just gotta learn to not let stuff bother you, until it becomes easier to deal with
And trust me, it doesn't take a girl to know that

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You don't even know what they are saying. It hurts.
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No, but I've heard the devil taunting me, and it hurts too. You've just got to be strong through it
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SikaRose
It annoys me how people can say Don't let it bother you....
You can't just let it "don't bother you" all the sudden! No matter what you're dealing with, certain things HURT. It's like being allergic to bees, almost dying from an allergic reaction, then when a bee lands on you , people are like....don't let it bother you. WHAT THE HECK OF COURSE IT BOTHERS ME I ALMOST DIED!
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Just take a lucky charm and talk to yourself when you feel like cutting. Have a imaginary friend and pretend like your talking to a real person just let it all out .

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