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My best friend has fallen in love with me & I've kind of lead him on.. how do I get out of this?

I recently just got out of a relationship that lasted almost 2 years, so.. I'm not completely over it. Well, my best friend just told me he had strong feelings for me. I've been friends with him since we were kids, well.. for some reason I told him it was a mutual feeling. I only said that so I wouldn't hurt him. But, about a month ago I told him I just wanted to be friends. He didn't take it well, at all. He had other people send me messages telling me how much of a bitch I was.. for being honest. Anyways, I told him that I was sorry. Then, I made the mistake of sleeping with him and now, I have no idea on how to get out of this. I want to get back together with my ex, but Tanner (the friend) is in the way. It was an honest mistake. It's not like I had any intentions on hurting him, that's the last thing I want to do. But, what's an easy way to tell him I want to be friends without hurting him. On another note, he just got out of a long relationship, and according to him.. his heart is "frail and weak" he says he can't handle another heartbreak.. so, yeah. If I don't get help.. FAST, I'm screwed. Thanks for reading and please give me any advice you have!
-Hayley

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Like crowrobot said, telling him the truth is the only option you have. He's going to be upset, but you can't keep leading him on. Don't be surprised if you lose a friend thou. I know I wouldn't put up with it.
Good luck.

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kazarina
Tanners friends had every right to be upset with her. I feel sorry for Tanner but I'm glad he has his other friends there to support him after she tells him.
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tell him the truth..his frail and weak heart will survive

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Introduce him to a girl, he will hopefully get the hint. or trap him in the friend zone.

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Hehehehe
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Than your friend is only getting in your life he is not a friend and if he loved you he would want the best for you and that is to let you go. Maybe in the future you'll feel something for him if not oh well it never was meant to be. Remember if you love something/someone set it free if it comes back it was meant to be if not it was NEVER meant. Good luck.

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The truth shall set you free. Sounds like something someone important said a long time ago... and it is fitting. He will survive the truth... but he probably wont be your friend anymore. Thats what happens when you use people.
WHY on earth would you want to get back with an X. People date to find out how compatible they are.... You and the X were obviously NOT very compatible.... and sleeping with other people is NOT a good way to try to get him back. I realize you said it was a mistake... You were right. That was a HUGE one.

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Truth, Truth, Truth!! Be open, that's the BEST way...

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You were on the rebound, and vulnerable - he knew that. Now he's trying to guilt trip you into being with him, which is uncool. However, give this guy a chance - he's bared his heart and soul to you and is probably deeply in love with you, and possibly has been since - like you said - since you were kids. What have you got to lose? What does it matter if you try getting back together with your ex tomorrow or next year. Sometimes people want to get back with their exes' because it's what they know. C'mon give Tanner a go, you might be surprised. Go team Tanner!

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I'm all for truth, but it can be done in a gentle way. Tell this guy, who is not your friend if he got his friends to send you hate mail, that you aren't ready for another relationship, because you are still getting over your ex. You thought you were and you wanted to be, but you're not. I can't decide if you're very confused, or you enjoy having drama in your life. Whatever the case is, cut this guy loose, telling you his heart is fragile is manipulative--I repeat, he is not your friend. And you weren't a very good friend when you lied to him, or when you had sex with him. Split.

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Very good.
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kazarina
Good answer Koichan. When you make your bed you lie in it. So who else is responsible for this situation.???
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Honesty is best

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Just explain to him.

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Be kind and honest. And DO not argue or back peddle!

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watch dawsons creek itll show you how to get out of it umya!

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kazarina

What you have done by playing with Tanners emotions knowing how he feels about you, not once but twice leads me to believe you are to shallow to be Tanners best friend any longer. You no longer fit the criteria for that position. Good on Tanners friends for sticking up for him & wanting to protect him from you. That's what good/best friends do. Learn from your mistakes & don't use people in the future. If your honest you will admit that sleeping with Tanner was to make your x jealous & hopefully get him back. Maturity is lacking in your judgement. Hopefully that will improve with age & life experiences in the future. I'm sorry if you don't like what I said but that's how I see it so that's how I called it,

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