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koichan: 4 months ago

I just got a 2 year-old Chihuahua, because I just have to have a lap dog and Chi's are champion lap dogs. However, (con't)

..she is attaching herself to my husband. This is a problem because he doesn't want a lap dog--I do. I hold her for hours and she is very sweet to me. She will sit in my lap, but jumps down to try and get into my husband's lap, watches him move around, and whines when he leaves the room. I guess it sounds selfish, but it's the plain truth--I want her for myself. We've only had her a week, any tips on how I can encourage her to bond more closely to me than she is?

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Answer 1

rustyboilerz: 4 months ago via Android | Last edited at 5:09AM on 2/8/2013

You used a key word, SHE! I've noticed my dogs simply chose the sex opposite of their own to bond with. It's odd yes, but for some unknown reason, all of my dogs have done this. Work with her, and hopefully shell learn to share her affections with you to your contentment. And remember, shes already two, and may have developed a strong bond with a male in her past. ;)

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Answer 2

Quester2011: 4 months ago

Well, considering she is a part of your family now and not just a "thing" she should be bonding to both of you. After all, she IS going to be living with both of you.

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koichan: 4 months ago

That is definitely true, and I do want her to love both of us, don't get me wrong, I'm not quite that selfish. I just want her to sit in my lap, and see me as her alpha female "dog."

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Quester2011: 4 months ago

I'll be honest, sitting on your lap should be a reward. If you let her sit on your lap all the time, she could start getting territorial of you. She may even get territorial of your husband. Then you're not the alpha dog - you're her property or a rival. It's very, very common for this to happen with lap dogs.

To bond with her, obedience training is good, especially if you use positive reinforcement like clicker training. You can also be the person to feed her. Play with her a lot, and learn new tricks. Giving her plenty of mental and physical exercise will keep her happy and well behaved. Only after she has been behaving should she be allowed in anyone's lap, for the reason I mentioned above. And then, she should only be allowed up if you invite her. Letting her do what she wants, when she wants, is a quick way to lose her respect as the alpha dog.

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Answer 3

ancient_hippy: 4 months ago

Simple solution, just lock your husband out of the house for a couple of weeks. On a more serious note, it seems the dog has made up her mind in the short time that you've had her. She may have previously bonded with a male in her first household, before you got her.

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koichan: 4 months ago

She's a rescue, and the only love she's known was her foster home. It appears that the man of the house gave her the most attention. Of course, with my husband--what's not to love!

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Answer 4

dawnbright: 4 months ago

be the one who takes her on walks. be the one who feeds and plays with her. 2yr old dogs still want to be challenged and have fun. Plus a dog does have a mind and will attach to whomever it chooses. Sounds like you actually should have gotten a cat

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koichan: 4 months ago

Cats worship my husband even more, I've never met a cat that didn't want to immediately jump on his lap, or at least get his attention--he's a cat magnet...would you believe my name is Kitty?

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dawnbright: 4 months ago

lmao !!!! yes I actually do believe you. you might need to get a goldfish lol

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koichan: 4 months ago

Ah, a unique way to feed the cats, right you are!

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Answer 5

BlackSapphire1995: 4 months ago

Female dogs often bond with men, not sure why. If you want, try not letting her lay with your husband, or have your husband leave the room (don't let her follow him when he gets up) if she wants in his lap. YOU NEED to be the one who FEEDS, BATHES, WATERS, WALKS< PLAYS WITH, CUDDLES her, not your husband. To a dog, if you feed and do things they like with them, you are the one they will turn to for affection. Dogs, however, have their own opinion on whom they trust and love, just as we, Homo Sapiens, do.

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koichan: 4 months ago

Thank you for your suggestions. I was afraid this was the solution; unfortunately, I'm disabled and have a lot of trouble standing up, let alone walking. I'm thinking I'll take her for walks in my electric chair. I've almost always rescued female dogs and they attach to me because I hold them, while my husband generally is up and about too much to hold dogs. This one is the exception. Again, thanks for your input.

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Answer 6

flybynight: 4 months ago via iPhone

Force it to stay on your lap tell your husband to chase it off so it can do the right thing and be with you .Its your husbands fault . he is encouraging it

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koichan: 4 months ago

He's not encouraging it because he knows how important having a lap dog is to me. But it's confusing to me because I also want her to bond with him, just bond more with me!

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Answer 7

Sincerity: 4 months ago

Female dogs do this and the same thing happened to me and I adopted a dog that was afraid of men!! (I didn't know it at the time) We finally worked out a compromise after I decided the best thing for the dog was to let her love her new "dad". For some reason known only to nature, female dogs want the acceptance from the male in the family. But when night time comes and Shen we go to bed, she sleeps next to ME on her bed, and she sleeps next to me with her naps if on the couch. So it WILL WORK OUT to where the BOTH of you will get to enjoy your pet. If you get another dog just for you, you can't guarantee it will bond with you only. This dog is making a special new kind of bond between you and your husband and she loves both of you. I promise it will all even out. When he goes to bed at night, spend some time with just you and her. Many female dogs do this when they first enter the family..

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koichan: 4 months ago

Thanks Sin, I appreciate your input. In 15 years, this is the first dog that has bonded with him instead of me. He's a cat man, I'm a dog woman. However, you are right, she spends lots of time on my lap too. I stay up later than my husband, and when he goes to bed, she whines until she gets in the bedroom with him...oh well. She's made her choice and I'm not one to try and force anyone, animal or human, to do what I want it to do, love whom I choose, or become something it isn't. I love her just the way she is. Hope all is well with you!

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Sincerity: 4 months ago

Wow! That is strange because my dog doesn't cry for my husband. Maybe it's all his hair on his chest she likes! Maybe it makes her feel safe for some reason. Oh, that is too bad. Anyway, doing okay. I'm not on here much and was glad to see you back on just now. I hope you are feeling okay today. For Valentines Day my husband went and got us some take-out steaks and baked potatoes and we watched Gone With the Wind on TCM. It's great not feeling like we have to go out and these days we don't have that kind of money. Well, going to try and get some sleep! Have a great day Koi !

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koichan: 4 months ago

Thanks, you too. We stayed home also. Huzzy's not feeling well. Good night!

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