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What are the pros and cons of letting my 18 year old daughter throw a party in our house.

she has asked and asked to the point I'm ready to give in, first off there will be NO ALCOHOL, in my house and she knows that! it's for her birthday and she wants to have around 20 to 40 people in my house. I told her that the party had to take place down stairs and they were to stay off the third floor the last thing I need is teenager's getting fresh in my bed or falling off the balcony. of course she said we couldn't be there so we all can go visit grandma and my brother would be stopping in to check for alcohol and things of that sort but I'm just curious what good could come from this and what bad can come from it. I get so nervous having that many teenagers in my house but my daughter is 18 and responsible.
I also don't need your negative comments if I wanted negativity I would have asked my mother in law ;) Thank you in advance!

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dont let her most guys around that age are dumb a$$ and they only want one thing from girl like her age trust me

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Oh I know what you mean!
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guys will look just to use her
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im not even a dad yet and i know how they are
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Not all guys are like this
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thats why i sed most because im not one of them
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TheMightyMouseGirl

She's 18 let her have some fun.

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20 to 40 people is a large number for one responsible 18 year old to look over. I would suggest lowering the number a bit. If you feel you can trust every teenage there to follow your house rules then I don't see much of a problem. You are still responsible for what happens in your house , just keep that in mind.

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I know that's what worries me the most!
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Fun with restriction is a must. You can allow her with a positive attitude and be optimistic but must keep the dignity and peace of the house in mind.

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Install cameras. End of story.

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Pros:
Allowing her to use your house can give you more control over the party. For instance, instead of telling her "be home by 10" and HOPING she does, you can just go back home.
She is more likely to follow your rules.
It's cheaper than renting a place.
She'll have more fun.

Cons:
If its going to be unchaperoned, you are still liable if anyone gets injured in your house - for example broken glass.
20-40 people is too large of a number for one girl to control. There should be a few people there the whole time to monitor it, especially if a few people end up fighting or someone gets hurt (stairs, pool, broken stuff, just fighting.)
Teenagers are notorious for a reason... just because your daughter will follow your rules, doesn't mean her friend's friends will. There will probably be at least one small group who try to sneak in alcohol or drugs.
Something will probably get broken. Something may get stolen.
Noise complaints from neighbors.

I would strongly recommend someone at LEAST being in the house, even if not directly involved in that party. That way, if something happens or your daughter gets in over her head, there is an adult there to manage the situation.

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oh my that's a lot to think about.
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Yup. Sorry to be a downer. I'm not a teen anymore but I had been to a few parties, usually 10-15 was a good maximum for a self-controlled party. After that you get people you don't know as well, or friends bringing a cousin or other friend, people just "sneaking in," or someone has an old grudge with another person... Even with all of the good intentions, large parties can spiral out of control fast.
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fritzmerde

I can't recall the number of "no alcohol" parties I attended because I was too bombed. I could get kegs into your house & you'd be shocked at the number of drunks throwing up in your living room. Where there's a will there's a way, and it's so easy to get it in it's a joke. With being drunk goes the inhibitions & your bed becomes romper room for teens. No way in hell would I not be there, that's an invitation to trouble. I frankly don't worry about 18 year olds drinking in my house, I joined the army and was running around with fun toys. CYA is what you need to do, if somebody crashes their car into a tree, it's your fault, Anything that happens to anyone that was at your house you will be the responsible person. It's a crime (if you were on the moon when the party went on--doesn't matter-your house=your party. The rules, you can have your party, I'll be upstairs and will be floating in and out. If I see drugs, alcohol I'm taking it Anybody that smells like they've been drinking gives me their car keys and they're either spending the night or going with a D-driver. They can still have fun, but nobody dies or gets hurt on my watch-period

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I might just tell her that her dad has to be there to supervise. my husband is a retired marine lol I think he can keep things under control.
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Maybe you should rent a place, so your stuff won't be stolen...

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rent a cop for that night! and yur crazy to let 20 to 40 people in yur house maybe 10 if i new them and there family and my kid grew up wit them no broblem but dont know them at all never well i alow that many people in my house so dont

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There are no pros
Only cons

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Sorry, but the "no alcohol" part will never happen. I'm sure your daughter is a good girl, but that doesn't stop the others from bringing it in (even if you are at home) & trust me.....
They will. Also, in some states even if you do not supply the alcohol & a child gets killed in a wreck on the way home, you & possibly your daughter (18 & all) could be responsible.

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my feeling is that if she wants a party ay MY house, and because I own the house and am responsible for those in MY house, I will be there.
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maybe make the agreement that you will stay in your room with periodic checks (do not give a set time like 10:30) at certain intervals.
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if the police are called for noise or any other issue and they find minors with alcohol, you are responsible whether you are home or not. i do not know that i could trust 40 other kids that i barely know.

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she's 18 you should trust her by now she's basically a adult young one.....if you don't trust her get cameras

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