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When girls set themselves up to be treated badly do they deserve to be treated badly?

I've seen too many girls go for the attractive guy that takes advantage of her. That type of dude is only making a move on her because he likes the way she looks and some girls fall for that. Personally I don't like the way a girl is treated in this situation but if a girl actually falls for that should I feel sorry for that?

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"Set themselves up to be treated badly"?! No one willingly asks to be treated badly. If you treat someone badly, then you are a bad person.

Men who take advantage of women are trying to take advantage of women. I'm not sure if you are completely ignorant of the subject or just misogynistic enough to suggest that men can do no wrong.

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Feisty, today.
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I agree, but I had no intention to tell that girls actually deserve this treatment. I wanted only to tell everyone that this is what guys think when they want to take advantage of a girl in which they're atractive to the girl being taken for granted. I was just sick that this was the way our society is and that's why I asked this question.
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Oh, sorry I think everyone misread your question then!
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That or my question was a little harsh.
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You really shouldn't speak for everyone. There are almost infinite reasons for people to want an almost infinite number of things, including being treated badly. Likewise people who treat others badly aren't necessarily bad themselves - it may be the case 90% of the time but there's always that one person who feels they have to.
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no.

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Nobody deserves to be treated badly

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not deserve... but they shoulda seen it coming.

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Not every girl has the life experience to know those things. So a rape victim "shoulda seen it coming"?
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a rape victim didnt choose to get raped though
those girls chose to be with those men.
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Because the men trick the girls into believing they want more than just a one night stand. It's the intention of the men that make the deed wrong.
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NOBODY deserves to be treated badly. You can feel sorry for her for making a bad decision but... she doesnt deserve it.
Many girls ask questions on ask about whether or not they should be with the good looking guy that bores them or with the so-so guy that they are interested in. Seems as though too many people are hung up on looks and how they are perceived then they are with their own happiness.

Guys do this too by the way... didnt mean to single out the girls. Guys will be with a pretty girl that just uses them... spends their money etc etc. It truly works both ways.... People, I would think, would want to be happy, but they prove to often that they want to be perceived in other ways.

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No one deserves to be treated badly.

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I understantd that but it's considdered a trap for girls and at most times they can't get out of it.
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Anyone can get out of it. They just need the support of family and friends. Friends will also try to warn her before she gets into trouble. Some people just have to learn the hard way, but that doesn't mean they deserve to be treated badly. And when they do get out of it "I told you so" is just as bad. All you can do is be a friend and support them.
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I guess that works but for the girls I don't know I'm not so sure I can help them. I guess what I'm trying to say is that it's kind of sick that many girls fall sort of thing.
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They fall for it because the guy is usually very nice and attentive at first. He strokes their ego. For some people that is very enticing. He targets people who have low self esteem. He isn't going to go after someone strong. It is sad there are people like that, and the gender really doesn't matter. There are just as many women that use men.

What is sadder is that there are people who haven't been taught they deserve better. Or that they haven't had people around them to build their self esteem so that they don't fall into that trap. That isn't their fault, is it?
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I don't think so. I definitely agree with you. I just wish that more people treasured a relationship where the guy puts his girlfriend first and the girl would apreciate that. That's something I want.
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I agree, but it isn't a perfect world.
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One can only hope to make it better can't they?
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No more than the guys who go after "hot babes" that are going to walk all over them deserve to be treated that way. Some people can't learn from observation, so they have to learn from experience.

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No, girls don't deserve to be treated that way. I agree sometimes they share part of the blame for putting themselves in that position and making foolish choices. But this does not absolve the guys who treat them this way from guilt. I would say these girls are guilty of poor judgment but that doesn't mean they deserve what they get.

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Nobody ever intentionally sets themselves up to be treated badly, outside of some S&M type stuff, lol. Anyway, most of these folks you're seeing probably have no idea that they're all disappointing you so much, they're most likely just trying to find brief moments of happiness in a life filled with misery and heartbreak. Folks go with what they know, and what they've seen, so if you want to get an idea of what you're getting into with someone, meet the folks who raised them...

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See, I knew your momma raised you right! ;0)
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Well, she did her best, lol :D
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I'm not exactly disapointed with the people I know that get into this sort of thing but I see this world wide and I think it's kind of sick that this is the way our society is. Personally I don't think they deserve to be treated badly but that's what the guys that make the inapropriate move think that girls want it. But they don't. You know what I mean?
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I'm pretty sure I do know what you mean, and if I do then I totally agree with you. Plenty of people do set themselves up for bad things to happen to them, I know because I'm one of them, lol ;) Its not that I want to be hurt or treated miserably, its more that I feel like I just gotta try harder than I did last time, or something...
I can't speak for the ladies out there who fall for dirt bag guys, but I know its two sided and I can speak for some of the guys who fall for dirt bag women, lol. For me, I seem to be drawn towards women with serious issues. For whatever reason I always get the crazy idea that I'm the one that will be able to help them, even though its never worked for anyone else and I've got loads of my own issues to sort out, lol. If I had to guess, I'd say it comes from me growing up and watching my mom try to deal with her issues, and the different guys that made things worse for her, but that's a whole other story. But, even knowing all that, I keep on doing the same thing over and over, I can't seem to help it. Its actually really frustrating because I'm totally aware of it and do it anyway. I imagine its pretty similar for most folks, just different motivations leading to different misconceptions and mistakes for different people.
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I understand.
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There is never a reason to blame the victim. The "she was asking for it" spiel is old, it's rude, and it's insensitive. Same goes for the reverse situation.

I'm going to tell you a story. I started dating a very nice, very attractive guy. The relationship lasted about 2 years. The "bad" qualities of a BF showed up gradually. He started getting more possessive, more defensive, more easily angered and aggressive. He would make demeaning remarks, but he would also still act cuddly and nice. I eventually lost all self respect and self esteem, just spent my time either with him or by myself. Eventually I realized what was going on an ended it... that was not a pretty event. It isn't always just that we are distracted by a guy's looks, but he can also be MOSTLY nice but then use our appreciation of his niceness to his advantage. That lowers your standards bit by bit, until you realize how bad of a situation it really is. But NO ONE goes looking to be in that situation so NO ONE should be blamed as a victim. It is the aggressor's fault they chose to behave that way, plain and simple. A woman is not at fault for a man deciding to be a [insert choice words here.]

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Went through that with my previous boyfriend. I had absolutely awful self esteem, and finally got the courage to break up with him. Glad you turned out ok again :)
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I agree. It is the guy at fault but I really shouldn't say that because it sounds like I could be better than them and I would make a better boyfriend. I can't ever say that because in many ways I may not be that different from this disrespectful guy. Also I don't think that girls deserve this treatment because it is in fact cruel but that's what the disrespectful guys think that they deserve this treatment or they want it. No matter how shallow the situation is this is infact wrong. I wasn't trying to send a wrong message or anything it's just that when men do this they think it's our society and its very sick.
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When young girls are inexperienced and hopeful, they experiment with their relationships with boys, just as boys experiment with their communication with girls. Everybody has clumsy moments they regret, but the criticism against girls is much harsher than against boys. Girls don't set themselves up for disrespect -- their efforts to gain male attention and affection often goes wrong. That is when they need to be treated well, because they are recovering from their own social awkwardness.

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yeah kinda, because girls dont wanna be treated like that but sometimes they have to in certain situations or maybe they r in a bad relationship but they dont even know it because the guy can charm them. i used to be in a bad relationship with a guy who abused me and used me for money but when i confronted him about it, he denied it and said he was protecting us and our future and put that stupid charm on me that i always felt for. i didnt know i was in a relationsip that bad until everybody started telling me what he was doing and who iwas becoming. relationships like that can really make a person blind and not know what they r doing. i never wanted to be in a relationship like that, actually i used to call girls stupid for being in relationships like that but that was before i realized i turned into oneof those girls. now, instead of laughing at that or criticising them, i try to help them see their mistakes so it doesnt get really bad to the point where they cant do aything about it.

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My question may have been a little harsh for women. There was a time where I wanted to help girls in this situation but not sound like I was better than the guy she was with and say I would have been better for her. They got better over time but situation keeps repeating itself for other girls and eventually I just gave up and got angry that this is the way our society portrays a relationship. I apolligize if this sounded like a negative opinion.
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I hope that you miss/mrs Stevens
Do realize that there are those who are
Not like your previous bad relationship
And I'm sure there are those who feel the same as you ,.
Thankfully your friends were there to help you realize your situation
Before it was to late.
Strong , steadfast beliefs , and a strong mind, makes a strong , strong person . And to face the " reality"
And stay true to yourself , is very , very admiring . No charm , no lie , just callin it from the subject of your note .
Wish there were more such as you
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Lots do , and they should've seen it coming , but they ignore the first signs , and spend the rest dealing with the fact that they fell for it, a good girl will fall , as easy as any other girl , and most men /boys will also , it's a lesson , in life , it's all fine , until one starts to have self denial issues , and lets face it , more often than thought , the same will allow it to happen more than once , as if they forgot the first time,
Good girl or not / good guy or not .

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Yes, I think they do set themselves up. And I also think they deserve to be treated badly. Why? So they can learn a lesson eventually!

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Eh. Maybe a little, but nothing long term. Karma's a good way of learning - she chooses to date a guy for his looks, gets her heart broken, she's deservedly sad and, assuming she's not a complete idiot, she's learned a valuable lesson. It works both ways for males and females.

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No one should ever be treated poorly regardless of the situation.

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