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Need advice please! Been married 9.5 yrs but with my husband for 10. His work is taking over our lives and I have no idea what to do!

My husband works hours sometimes until 2, 3 or even 5 or 6AM during the week and weekends. Midnight has become a standard thing. No he isn't having an affair. I know this because when he's working after hours he's sitting in our living room. While he can come home we are stuck here all the time because of his job. His phone NEVER leaves his side and he's constantly checking it. I had to take him to the mountains on vacay where there was no reception just to get a break from his job. That's where the problem is. I've been on disability for a few years now so all the household responsibility falls on him. I've suggested home health and a maid he shot both down. Feels like I'm more than just a burden I feel like he resents marrying me. It's his actions and body language that says it. He use to be thoughtful, detail oriented, loving, caring and kind. Now he doesn't look at me anymore like he did when we first married even though he had that look for several years. How do I get him back when I'm disabled?

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Buy the "The Proper Feeding of Husbands " , she was a talk show host. Forget her name. Do t take it wrong, I think there is one for men too. It's a great book. In fact I have given it out to many people, and most really appreciate it. Good luck, ur young. Take it from an oldster, stay way far away from any drama.

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That's Dr Laura!!!! and i can't remember her last name either its really different and long but I know who SHE is. BTW she still is a talk show host on NPR and I'm not that young. We didn't get married until i was 28. Just turned 38 last month but I love you even though we have never met just for saying that I was young! You just made my day!!! Don't listen to Dr Laura's show anymore because I don't work. My disability prevents me from doing so. Agree drama ruins alot of things! TY for the advice as I didn't know about her book but I'm going to order it off of Amazon now! You make sure they get you your commission check off of this sale mkay? lol *winks* ;)
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Couples counseling. If he won't go with you, you go by your self.

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before you do anything,sit him down and have a serious talk with him,tell him exactly how you feel then let him tell you how he feels then you can try to solve the problem together

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kazarina

You said your disabled. Are you able to cook or order home delivery & set up a relaxed dinner for the two of you. If you can get help from family or friends to pull it off, it may allow you two some quality time. Maybe he works so hard because he doesn't want to let you down &needs to keep abreast of all the bills. Ask him to spare a small amount of time to just spend with you each day. Praise him for his hard work & say that you understand that he probably feels under a lot of stress daily. Tell him you are concerned it will make him sick if he doesn't take some time out from work. Remind him how much you value your marriage & that you love him.

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Wanted to thank you for your advice. He didn't realize how concerned I was about his health and now he tries to take time each day if it's just a few minutes to catch up and talk. It's been a big change from where we were at the beginning of summer! Thanks again!
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