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How do I get my son to open up? Read description.

My son, Asher, 14, is being really quiet lately. I found a used condom in his wastebasket in his room. I asked him about it and he just shrugged. I stepped back to give him time. But he won't open up about anything. But I am concerned because the condom is broken, and I've given him a lot of time to open up, and I haven't pressured him, however I am very concerned about him. How can I get him to open up, and why is Asher being so quiet? He's normal a little more energetic (Usually shy and quiet but funny, jokester, not now)

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He's 14. This is pretty-much normal behavior for a boy his age. Trust me- I've had 3 sons. I like to say boys go koo-koo from about 13 to 17, then they gain their sanity back. He doesn't want to talk to MOM about that condom, or anything else like that. He probably was experimenting, ok? Best bet is to let him know he can talk to you and/or Dad about anything. Leave good reading material around so he can check it out (sex, relationships, etc.) At 14 or so, they get frustratingly quiet about stuff. Humor helps, ok? He's beginning to separate himself from you guys, and on the path to becoming a man. We know he's still your baby and needs you, but this is a tough time. It WILL get better. Back off, praise him for the 'manly' things he does, ask for his help on stuff. Keep being the good parent.

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He may have been using it alone. If you know what I mean........

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He might be having bullying problems or have depression. I would suggest letting him take some time out of school if he wants to. Then he will open up. Also if he wants something you can buy it for him so he will feel more generous and maybe share why he has a condom in his room.

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Spoiling him wouldn't be an answer
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He is probably embarrassed to talk to you about it. If he were my 14 year old, I would sit him down and have a real conversation about it. Whether he likes it or not. I raised three sons.

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Why are you going through your 14 year-old's wastebasket? He is at the age where he needs some privacy, especially around that kind of thing. You don't tell us whether you are his mom or dad. This is probably something his dad, or a male relative would have an easier time dealing with. He is most likely terribly embarrassed about it. I suggest you back off completely and suggest he talk to another male about what's going on with him.

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hey a couple of months ago i found one in my 14 year old son justices room.... i was so worried! turns out he was just useing them for ballons....

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Lol SURE he was!!
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Let Asher, know you are there for him when he wants to talk about it . This is a sensitive issue and being his mom not a comfy one for him to talk about . I know this may be hard to do but take a deep breath , and wait .... Talk of other things and act normal . He knows you know . Time has away of telling the truth .

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