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My sister in law keeps butting in my husband and i's custody case for his little boy. How do i tell her its none of her business? Details..

My husband and I are trying to get custody of his little boy from his mother. we go to court in Feb. Well my sister in law keeps forcing her self into our business. She forced us to use her lawyer and calls all the time to check on the case. I feel like that should me our responsibility. Shes even going to court with us which i think is none of her business. I dont know why shes doing this. its not like she cares about either of our kids or us. i dont know how to tell her in a nice way its none of her business.

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I don't know how she forced you to use her lawyer, but from now on you need to make your own decisions because every time you let her decide something for you it is like telling her it is okay to butt in. It sounds like she has something against her mother and is using your situation to get back at her. The best way to tell her is to just sit her down and say you appreciate her concern and everything she has done for you, but it is between you and your husband and it is time the two of you took control of the situation. If you don't, the resentment will continue to grow until there won't be anything nice said any more.

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Tell her although your concerns are dear to my heart, please butt out and let us handle our own business.

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you can kindly take her aside and politely say that while she is family you feel like she is over stepping her boundaries in a matter that is better left in the much capable hands of you and your husband. tell her that you appreciate all the help and advice she's been so care to give, but that you and your husband are ready to go this alone. now you don't have to say this in particular but something along these lines should do. just remember to sound grateful and appreciative without over doing it, yet firm and serious as to not give her the wrong impression. this way she's be less likely to "nose in" on future occasions and you would have made your point without bruising her pride or making waves. so good luck and I hope this was helpful even in some small way. :)

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I completely agree with redmiss. I also don't think that her being in court with you is a good idea. She is being very pushy and controlling and she'll probably be the same way in court which will definitely not work in your favor. You might try explaining to her that while you appreciate her help, this is a battle between you, your husband, and the child's mother. That you will feel more comfortable with just the three of you in the courtroom. She will be upset with your decision to not allow her in the courtroom but honestly, it's none of her business. You need to focus on your court battle right now and not be constantly fighting her and going out of your way to accommodate her craziness. Talk to her! Good luck!

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Your husband needs to deal with the situation not you. If it bothers him, then he can tell her to back off, it is his sister. He may like the support. This is more of his family issue, you are just a stepparent

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Not "just" a step-parent. Wife.

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Jalo, that was so right on
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I will be raising this child. Fixing every meal he eats, feeding it to him giving him every bath he takes. washing all of his clothes and dressing him. changing every diaper he wears. putting him to bed every night and getting up every morning doing the same thing over again. that doesnt sound like "just" a step parent to me. the child is going to be in my house every day untill he is ready to move out!
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Your issue is actually with your husband, no your sister-in-law. Either he's inviting her intrusions or he's wishy washy. Tell him how you feel and let him deal with it. If he doesn't, you know where the problem lies.

If you get into it with her directly, she'll just resent you and stab you in the back for the rest of your marriage.

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well he wont tell his sister to butt out. they all treat him like hes a 10 year old and he doesnt want to make them mad so he wont say a word.
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Then I'm afraid you're stuck. If you do it, you'll be the bad guy and you don't want that.

You could tell him to "man up" and get it done but that may likely to cause friction between the two of you. Basically, it boils down to whether thus is a big enough deal to fight over or if you want to just swallow it.
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Maybe your husband wants this. Maybe you knew from before his attachment to his family, so it shouldn't be such a shock to you that he is allowing the sister to butt in.

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he just wont tell her to stop because they all treat him like hes 10
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I hope you can solve your problem, it seems like you want what's best for the kid.
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