Submit a question to our community and get an answer from real people.
Submit

I have just left a very abusive relationship of 5 years and have a 3 year old son with my ex. How do I move on and stop thinking about him?

Left an Abusive Relationship

Report as

You left him for a reason, It's hard to just forget about someone, you got out of an abusive relationship, that's a hard thing to do to , I'm sure he caused you more harm than good , keep moving forward , give it time!

Helpful (2) Fun Thanks for voting Comments (0)
Report as
Add a comment...

Find something you've always wanted to do but couldn't. Then do it. You'll find someone else with tim

Helpful Fun Thanks for voting Comments (0)
Report as
Add a comment...

Focus on your son and his needs and yourself as well. Don't dwell on the past or it will eat you up.It'll take time but you'll move past it. Just remember he will always be in your life because of your son but you can limit how he affects you. - Keep you head your head up :)

Helpful Fun Thanks for voting Comments (0)
Report as
Add a comment...

First and foremost, you need to get rid of all reminders of your ex. Cleanse your life of anything that reminds you of painful memories of this person. Stop thinking about her by getting yourself busy and use the extra time you have to exercise or read a novel. If you still have trouble, set aside an hour or so to sit down and write out all feelings regarding what happened.

Helpful Fun Thanks for voting Comments (0)
Report as
Add a comment...

You have a son who will always remind you of your ex though.It is something you can't avoid.But you have to understand that dwelling on someone who hurt you in the past is diminishing to you and your son.Think this way-he was not worth me,my life will change for better when he is out of my life and there are many dating websites where I can meet someone better,someone who cares and someone who will love me and need me.Abusive people must let go.No options there.Head up,lady!

Helpful Fun Thanks for voting Comments (0)
Report as
Add a comment...

Remember all the times he abused you. Focus on your son and both of y'all's future. You don't want your son growing up to believe its ok to abuse someone he's suppose to love. It's your responsibility to make sure he learns to treat people with respect and not abuse. You won't be able to do your job raising him right if you're getting beat up or whatever he does to abuse you.

Helpful (1) Fun Thanks for voting Comments (0)
Report as
Add a comment...

Start by doing what it sounds like you should have been doing the last five years. Take care of yourself and your son. Time heals all wounds it just takes a little longer than we like. It's time to be strong for yourself and your son and you will be just fine. Good luck you have made your first move forward don't go backwards.

Helpful Fun Thanks for voting Comments (0)
Report as
Add a comment...

First congratulations on getting out. Always think of your son. This is the best thing you could do for him. Think of your son any time you might be tempted to 'forgive' your abuser, believe the lies he will lay on you, and go back to him. Your son and keeping him safe and healthy must be your topmost priority and returning to an abusive man will not accomplish that. YOU being under the control if an abusive man wont accomplish that either. My sister finally got out if a verbally/emotionally abusive relationship after nineteen years. She has found great help and support thru a church based twelve step style support group called Celebrate Recovery. You could search online for a church in your area that hosts it. While it is Biblically based it is for everyone, not just church people, and its free tho you may need to pay for a work book that goes with the program. If a church charges any other fees they violate the program intent so look for a different church with the same program.

Helpful Fun Thanks for voting Comments (0)
Report as
Add a comment...

Don't live with another guy. Don't go back to the abusive guy. Take care of your son. Get an education & a better job. Do not let your ex.visit your son, he is a bad influence. Focus on finding a better life for you and your son.

Helpful Fun Thanks for voting Comments (0)
Report as
Add a comment...
Do you have an answer?
Answer this question...
Did you mean?
Login or Join the Community to answer