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My wife bought a car without telling me should I be mad?

My wife bought a car without saying a word before hand. After she did so she made it my fault. She didn't like spending money on our expenses. She thought it was up to me to pay for everything. We were saving for a house. But she just goes out and spends money on a 16k car. She said that a husband should pay for everything and a wives money is her own to do with what she wants. She asks "...don't I deserve it'?

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Oh geez...another one of those "entitled" females. I'm a female and I'm ticked at her...You two are married and honestly, what she did was disrespectful to your marriage. I don't give a rats patootie what anybody says, this business of the husband's earnings taking care of bills and the wife's earnings are hers for spending as she wants is pure hogwash. Little princess needs to grow up.

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Perfect.
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and get a job!!!!!!!!
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Totally agree!!!!
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I swear ladies, doesn't this just push a button??!! ;)
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It's women like these that give us all a bad name..... Hopefully he dumps her!!!!
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Wait till she meets the judge that tells her money is equal property, lol
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Yeah but you know she's going to go for alimony........ poor guy!!!!!
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I soooo agree with this answer!!!!
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Ya

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ibepwning

Definitely. Huge decisions like this should be made by both the husband and the wife.

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Aw yeah, be mad... Be very mad...

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The two of you should have discussed it and it's understandable that you would be upset, I believe if the shoe was on the other foot, she would be upset with you.

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She sounds selfish and ya you have every right to be upset. Don't let her turn around. The point isn't if she deserves it, the point is she went out and spent 16 grand without even consulting you. I'd make her take back car.

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Heck to the yes!
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lol
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Yes. If it's her very own money, and none of it's yours then you should still be mad, but dont help her pay for it! Make her do it herself. And don't buy her a new house

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That is a very bad conception on her part, if she feels like that, what is next? Hell yah, i would make her return it or get rid of her, she is not a trusting wife, she broke a sacred part of marriage(trust)....that is Wrong!!

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If it causes a money problem then yes, but if there is no problem with money then let her buy one and enjoy the car.

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I was going to say that you should be disgruntled, but, no, you have every right to be pissed off. I'd be ticked I were in your situation. What is it with women thinking that they're entitled to things like that? Not all women, but you know what I'm saying. I big decision like that should be discussed between both of you. I mean, she's pretty much throwing away money into a dumpster. A car is not needed now. A house to live in is more important. I think it's funny that she said "Don't I deserve it?" Did she doing anything to deserve it? Haha. A husband and wife are supposed to share everything together, not wildly spend precious money on selfish desires. The car can wait.

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That's right!
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Huge mistake on her part...I feel so bad for you, I just don't know what to say... Even a spoiled brat knows better than to do something that huge on purpose...take some deep breaths, hold your temper, and call a Marital Counselor FIRST thing in the morning....

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Hey there, how are you? Hope you're doing well !!
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Hey Kookie... I'm doing well, need to be asleep, but on Ask...lol
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Girl, don't I know how that feels, I just can't help myself sometimes, lol
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Hey, maybe I caught you tonight... Lol
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Guess not... Later
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I've been married to my hubby for a long time and wouldn't even think about making a purchase like that with out him involved. During our marriage there have been times when I have made more money and other times when he has made more money. It doesn't matter because we are a team supporting a house and family TOGETHER!!!!!! You are not her Daddy and are not responsible for taking care of her. Tell her grow up and stop acting like a princess. Until she straightens out do not have kids with her. This type of woman puts her self before every thing else. If she doesn't change her behavior I wouldn't waste the rest of your life with her. She'll just bring you a hard time then divorce you when the cash runs out. Oh and by the way she WILL sue for alimony...... good luck!!!!!

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Well said, this is the way we do things at my house too. My money is his money, his money is my money, that's what marriage is.
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That's why we've been married so long.....
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You're right, we must know a thing or two to make it last 29 years, lol
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Bravo!!
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Thanks TL!!!!! are you on the road again or still on the mend?
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Hope your feeling better Truckie. I found a really cool picture of a Rig....I'll send it to you. Hope you like green.
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If your trying to save for a house then yes I see how this would be upsetting . Idk how your relationship is with your wife . I will say that her doing that is not unusual . I guess I'm saying that because I m guilty of that too. We have a house , so that's not the case here . But , yes when I need / want a car or other things I stop off and buy it . But , lol my husband says I'm CEO of the house and any thing pertaining to kids . so those things are my choice about to purchase two cars . he understands that once i pick cars , 2more will be in the drive . he will just come home and they will be there . he's fine with that . .that being said our relationship has always been that way .

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Your relationship sounds way more mature. Impressive!
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Thank you !
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How long have you been married? When you're married, money is equal property, any judge will tell you this. Your money is her money, just as her money is your money. You two need to sit down an discuss this or you won't be together very long.
Any big purchase should be discussed and both should agree before anything is bought, so, yes I would be very upset.

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Been married since 2009. She moved out and she wants a divorce.
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Let her have it, but make her file.
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Absolutely, let her file, they'll see her for the greedy person she is.
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angelwolf

Wow, I thought she left you and that you'd decided that she used you for a green card. How did she do this. Maybe you can sell that card and get some money back.

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whats that aretha franklin song?

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I consider marriage a partnership. You just don't make large purchases, without discussing it with each other first. So , yes, I'd be livid!

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Agreed!
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You said it sister !!!
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Thanks guys. :-)
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That's absurd. It's abusive to you. You should explain to her that the approach "mine is ours and yours is only yours" won't work(I guess you' don't agree with the approach, if you do, disregard my message).

Her opinion is offensive not only to men but to women, too because now men will think that all women are like that and they are not. Talk to her, go to therapy if you want or whatever but this just have to be changed. It's a red alarm. Are you sure she's not a gold digger? Try working things out, otherwise you won't be happy in this marriage at all.

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No because I'm sure there's other stuff she didn't tell you. Cheers

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