2 years ago
Last edited at 3:42PM on 11/16/2011
Worry is not the operative word, anger is, who's running the insane asylum.
If I was the parent of a twelve year old and some other kid pierced her, there would be extreme consequences, and I don't mean hitting her, please don't do that, but a break from all e things would be in order, and a talk about responsibility, and a 300 word essay on what is right, and what is wrong, would be in order, as well as a little conversation with the other kids parents...
I agree with John^^^. Unless you gave her permission (???) then she broke a trust and should be punished. And I'd have a real conversation with the other girls parents about what your child is allowed to do and not do immediately!
Just imagine, if you don't fix your 12 year olds problem, just think of the problems you will have in the coming years since she can do whatever she want without consequences. I'd take that piercing out first and go from there.
Honestly it's completely normal for girls to do this. I did. Just let her calmly know how you feel about it and that you don't want it to happen again or that she's grounded from going out, phone, tv and computer. Just do you best to explain to her that it's important to keep the new piecing clean and if it's a cheap earring she has in there yous are going to have to change it out to something that won't tarnish.
2 years ago
Last edited at 3:47PM on 11/16/2011
First,ask her why would she get a second piercing without your consent. Second what should you be worried about That she might get another one or that she will follow what her friends do to the point where it will get her in a lot of trouble?
12 is a lil young for piercing but not realy its her body let her do what she wants with it,...im 15 and i have my bellybutton pierced my mom signed for it,i pierced my own lip,my mom was pissed but hey its my body,and if you dont let her do what she wants with it now she will when she is older trust me i know,just dont let her get tatoos those a permanent piercings can close and go away tatoos cant
Who would give a 12 year old a piercing? You should have a talk with her if it doesn#039;t work out take away her phone computer amp; t.v talk To her friends parents amp; talk to her friends you shouldn#039;t let her hang out with those kids anymore you should also tell her school amp; tell them to keep an eye out on her amp; her friends couple months they#039;ll start to do drugs amp; what not kids these days it sounds harsh but 12 year's old with 2 piercing's that's just crazy
I think that she should not be punished because that wil just make her grow anger towards you. A 12 year old does not know what they want, only what the THINK they want or need. My mother as i was growing up spoke sternly to me and now that i'm grown i wouldnt do anything that she wouldnt like for respect, atleast not until im out of the house
John is correct. You need to take hold of your parenting reins and turn this pony around. I would not allow her to keep the piercing. You are the parent here and she is a child. If you let this slide you are going down a slippery slope...children want and, more importantly need boundaries and rules. they need to know they can trust you to give consequences in a consistent and fair manner. this is how they learn to set boundaries for themselves.
Dont just punish her without talking about it first, with her, her friend, the friend's mother. just take it slow a watch out for any behavior changes but, that young (a difficult time in her life) it's mostly likely a faze :) but dont just ignore it
Your 12 Year Old Daughter Should Be Worried Because She Had The Piercing Done Without Your Knowledge and Consent. As The Parent Of This Minor Child, Make It Crystal Clear That She Understand That You Are Very Disappointed In How She Did The 2nd Piercing. -------------------------------------------------- I Agree With The Previous Comment In That The Other Girl#039;s Parents Must Be Contacted About The Role That She Play. They All Need To Understand That Equally As Important, Health / Sanitation Issues Are Of Utmost Concern As Well. ----------------- If Medical Attention Eventually Is Needed, Will The Other Girl#039;s Parents Take Responsibility? ------------------- To Answer The Last Part Of Your Question ------- Yes, You Should Be Worried; But, They All Should Be Much More Worried Under These Circumstances!
I'm with John_8715 on this one. Oh, I'd talk to the other parent, OK. But, If you can get that parent to agree to have a meeting with the two young "piercers" why not sit them down and remove the piercing in front of them all? Will they be embarrassed? I would hope so, but embarrassment is hard to come by these days. I would be more concerned about aids, or at the least an infection, more than I would embarrassment. No one's died of embarrassment yet.
She should be punished!! Having someone do that to your ear is very dangerous!!! I remember when I did that when I was younger...I ended up getting segury on my ear , & now my ear is read with a lump...it's SOOO not worth it!!!!
2 years ago
Last edited at 4:48PM on 11/16/2011
OK, what is the issue here? Is it the piercing or the fact that it was done without permission? If it's the piercing itself, clean it, put antibiotic on it, and keep an eye on it. If it's the fact that she did it without permission. Take her to the doctor, have it removed safely along with a stern lecture on getting parental permission before ever doing something like that again. Like John said it is always a good idea to meet with parents before allowing your children to spend long periods of time in their home. It's always good to let parents of your children's friends know, what is expected, what you do not allow your child to indulge in and to please feel free to call you if they don't understand these guidelines. It's just good old fashioned commonsense.
Agree with John! I would have so been punished if I did that at 12 years. Definitely talk to the girls parents and make it clear that you will hold them accountable if your daughter ever does something foolish while at their house. When a child is at friends house you are trusting they will remain safe while there. A pierced ear can easily get infected if not done correctly. Be sure your daughter understands her body is not entirely hers to do what she wishes. Let her know she needs to get permission first and accept the answer you give her. Once she can take care of herself then she is old enough to do what she pleases.
You are worried because of ? Infection? It's wrong on every level. The piercing, her age,the age of the piercer, the possibility of infection, the fact that she did it without permission, plus,the parent of the child, whom I assumed was to be watching over them, was not responsible. Take the earring out, for good. Ground her, and I would not let her around that family.If you want to continue the relationship, it should be under your supervision only.
2 years ago
Last edited at 7:11PM on 11/16/2011
Well if she just did it then yes you should tell her that she can't do things like that without your consent. I would be worrying about the friends she hangs out with though, is this friend a good influence on her? Did she peer pressure her into letting her give her the second piercing?