There's no easy answer. I'll be interested to see what other people suggest.
Seeing things as they requires detachment -- it's the difference between looking at yourself in the mirror or seeing a photograph of yourself. The first allows you to interpret what you see, the second forces you to see what's actually there. It's probably the reason some people don't like having their photograph taken because they think it makes them look bad.
One of my creative writing tutors suggested that, during the day, you project your awareness up near the ceiling and listen to what you're saying, or watch what you're doing. In this way, he said, you can see yourself as others do. It's a reality check.
Maybe you can do the same with situations, places, or people. Make a mental image of them functioning in a slightly different environment and see what still hangs true.