It can't really happen while you are sitting. It is a long way. And crowd is usually is a deal breaker. So I always like when I get a chance to walk alone in the first date, like on a boardwalk or park, not too dark though. You can get more focused on each other. I don't like when it has to happen at the girls door because it sometimes crates tension if she doesn't want to invite me in. Then it is like a dry kiss and run inside, ridiculous. Actually it doesn't really matter when or who starts, in my experience. The biggest aspect of the first kiss is how long.
If you can get close to their face for whatever, leaning to see a picture on your phone together or just trying to hear what they're saying, look at their lips as this is a body language sign that shows you are thinking of a kiss subconsciously or consciously as you are attracted to them, and the moment should be there. :)