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How do I burn my mustache off, without damaging my pristine upper lip?

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It's simple. You take a lighter and gently move it to and away from the motash as if gently whipping it so that the flame tip seductively licks at the tip of the hairs. Be bold, those hairs won't burn themselves. If you feel brave enough to endure a slight tingling sensation then take the lighter and briskly move it from left to right searing the hairs to the roots.

Do let me know how it goes.

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I shall treasure this information always.
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Guard it well
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Ummm... I'd recommend shaving.

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lol
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Buy a No No, use some wax, thread it, shave it, use a cream to remove it, but don't burn it off.

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Real men need flames to validate their worth, plebe.
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I'm married to a real man. He hasn't had the need to validate himself by lighting his hair on fire up to this point. I would attribute this to self confidence and the fact that he's a damn smart man in general.
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TalmadgeMcGulager: it will scar and it will be a different shade of skin under your lip. just shave.

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That sounds painful and stupid. A million things could happen. Your lip could scar or you could shake the lighter and burn you face. I don't think you should do that.

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