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MMA84

How do I tell my girlfriend how I really feel?

I have been dating my GF for about 6 weeks. she wants to take it to the next level but I'm not ready, and I'm not sure if I will ever be with her. I told her that I don't want to get married anytime in the near future, and she said she understands. Now she is always giving me hints like saying that she keeps having dreams that I proposed to her. She tells me that she loves me but I can't tell her back because I don't feel the same way, at least not yet. How do I tell her the truth without hurting her. She is a good person and I do not want to hurt her feelings. I'm having trouble thinking about what to tell her and how to say it. I'm confused .....

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You're not going to be able to say what you want to say without hurting her. She is ready, you are not. At six weeks in, I hardly think a proposal is a great idea and clearly, neither do you. The best thing you can do is be honest about how you feel now; start discussing where you both feel the relationship is at the present moment and where you want it to be in the future. If you feel the relationship should end because you don't see a future with her, do not drag it out any longer, as women tend to take that as hope. Good luck.

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MMA84
Thanks....Star
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Welcome. Have a great night. Hope it works out well for you.
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All this free advice. The counsellors union will get on your case!
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I know, lol. Sometimes it just comes out between the fun/nies.
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Six weeks?
Say, "I like you, but this is going way too fast for me."
Any good person will understand and respect that.

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It is not about what you want or not; her feelings are going to get hurt. It is more an issue of when. Of course sooner is better. So you just have to suck it up and deal with it. That is the right thing to do.
You told her that you don't want to get serious, she said okay but obviously that is not what she wants. And that is what you need to tell her. You want different things. It won't work.

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hey. from a female persepective..honesty is really the best way out of this situation. If you just withdraw from her or don't give her a clear answer then she will brew and become hurt with the confusion of why. It is best to explain your feelings to her, exactly like you did in the description. that you think she is a good person etc but your just not in the same space as her for this relationship.
Even though it might hurt her to hear it, she will be able to move on instead of being stuck in that place. So will you. either slowly together or hopefully as friends.

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MMA84
Thanks
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Next time you see each other, say"Listen. I really like you but to me this is going way to fast. Can we slow down a little?". And if she says yes, you are in luck my friend. ;-D

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Dating (And having a girlfriend) is actually meant for marriage later on. If you really don't love her that way then I'd actually suggest you two to gently break up, but if you're unsure, take it slow, very slow. Treat her nicely, but make sure that she knows the boundaries. If you don't want to marry yet why date? I'm sorry, but that doesn't make much sense. But if you don't want to follow any of this advice, and at least do me and her a favour by telling her the truth gently. Sorry to say, but girls assume, a lot sometimes, and the fact that you may not be responding will hurt her more than if you tell the honest truth :(

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MMA84
I like her she is a good person and I do enjoy her companionship but marriage is a lifetime commitment and this is way too soon to make that decision. This is why I'm bewildered and confused about what to do now.
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Then, yes, take your time and tell her the truth as soon as possible even if it hurts
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1). You already told her. You said you don't want to take things to "the next level". Whatever that is; I don't know what level you're at now.
2). I'll bet she is the one that hit-on you & asked you out. On face value of what you wrote, she's the one pushing the relationship & chasing you... instead of letting you (the male) chase her (the female). She's reversed the gender roles & your sub-conscious has rightly told you this is a f'd-up situation.
3). If you're as uncomfortable as I presume you are, break things off! Dump her!! You don't need my permission ... but you have it.

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