I say, "I am what I have always claimed to be, a piss-poor excuse of a human being, barely able to remember my own birthday much less the twenty things I have to do today. And not only do I forget, I am a terrible person too. I make no excuses, but I do admit to all faults real and imagined." If I don't get a laugh, at least the disclaimer will help next time. And there WILL be a next time (well, I give odds).