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Also Known As: Kong Fu-Zi Confucius was a teacher, scholar and minor political official whose commentary on Chinese literary classics developed into a pragmatic philosophy for daily life. Not strictly religious, the teachings of Confucius were a utilitarian approach to social harmony and defined moral obligations between individuals and social systems. After his death his pupils collected notes on his sayings and doings and recorded them as the Analects. This compilation was added to over th More »
Born: 551 B.C. (Lu, China(now Shandong province))


Jokes using puns and often risqué double-meanings 'fictitiously attributed' to Confucius, a famous Chinese philosopher (around 500 BC.) His name is.


In the name of true fun, Quotescoop.com has gathered the best Confucius jokes and funny sayings that will light up your day.


One prick - all gone; Confucius say, bird in the hand is not better than two in the ... Confucius say, man who have last laugh, not get joke; Confucius say, man ...


Sep 20, 2015 ... Collection of "Confucius Say" jokes which turned out to be surprisingly wise.


Confucius says, "Women who sit on judges lap, get honorable discharge". Confucius say, "Man who date Dynamite women get Big Bang out of her." Confucius ...


A joke is like sex. Neither is any good if you don't get it. Confucius Say Woman who fall in love with elevator operator, usually get the shaft. Confucius Say


Dec 1, 2014 ... A list of the most witty, intelligent, and actually funny Confucius say .... So how did Confucius manage to make a joke about car exhausts in ...


Jun 19, 2015 ... Confucius says - The 'wisdom' of Confucius? ... usually have bad memory, too; Man who tell one too many light bulb jokes will soon burn out ...


Feb 24, 2008 ... Funny Sayings of Confucius (Part V) ... Labels: Confucius Sayings (Part V) ... Man who tell one too many light bulb jokes will soon burn out!